beautifulB

Same! We need to get together sometime and have i-love-sparkles sessions!!  The more I think about that, the better of an idea it seems to be... :)

Califia

beautifulB~~Thanx so much for your vote on "Tattooed Princess." Hope yo get hooked on this story. I try to update a new chapter each weekend--assuming I don't sleep.
          
          Looking over  your teaser to "Winter's Sunrise",  I can tell you will be intrigued to my current story "WICCA Girls" featuring a young girl with supernatural abilities who grows into a witch. Yo can check out the Prologue here:
          http://www.wattpad.com/story/23221045-wicca-girl
          
          Hope we stay connected
          ~~Califia

beautifulB

For the space travel.... I think basically they're traveling to a parallel universe, and the people they meet first just kind of happened.... I don't really know what they have to do with the plot, yet, but I know I want to use them again.

gypsydream

@beautifulB Well I think I kinda get the space travel a little bit but the first people they meet? I dont see how they fit in.
          
          For my story, yes it is dark...:) I intended it to be. Sorry...and yeah I hated it when Prim died....
          back to my story what do you mean by confused as to who is talking? do you mean like if two or more people are having a conversation or the overall POV?
          And I will try to fix the lack of feeling thing...I know you already said that so that means I didn't fix it the first time...
          
          and for the time switch....just wait and see.....(Sinister smile) by the end of the book if it still doesn't make sense then tell me although that should be a while away. I plan to make at least 5 "books" maybe 6 and I will try to make then each 12 chapters long.

beautifulB

I'm still working on the first 3 chapters. I'm not as sure on the story as with the other 2 characters. Bella's story is still kind of sketchy, if you know what I mean. :) How does it not do along with the rest of the story, though? How can I make it make sense more?
          
          I totally understand your discomfort with reading spiritual rants. I get that. :) And I'm trying to write it in such a way that it doesn't scare readers away, which is still a work on progress.  I should definitely look back on the beginning and decide what I want.
          
          I would love to give you feedback! ;)  the truth is, I DO love it! There are times I'm kind of upset by how much gore and darkness there is, which is a sensitivity I've always had. I HATED Mockingjay..... mostly because Prim died. :) But also because of how much violence there is. I would say that your writing style and grammar is very good, but when you're writing conversations, I'm always confused about who's talking, so you could work on clarifying that a lot more. Also, tell me a little more about what Silver is feeling.  And there are times that I don't understand the whole time period-change thing. Are you going to clarify  more of what that's about as you continue to write? 
          
          Yeah, I think that's all I can think of right now. I'll let you know if I come up with any other questions. :)