bellanomnom

“Why is there music coming out of your printer?”
          -
          “That will be the paper jamming again!

My friend always says "cheer up, dude, it could be way worse, you could be stuck in an underground shaft filled with freezing water!"
          
          I know he means well...
          
          
          
          
          
          
          
          well...

Care to seduce a large woman? Piece of cake.

My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving

a guy was admitted to hospital with 8 plastic horses in his stomach.
          
          His condition is now stable.

Whenever I undress in the bathroom, my shower gets turned on.

I owe a lot to the sidewalks. They’ve been keeping me off the streets for years.