billierosiestories

I don't know how much Wattpad has changed during the 1-2 yrs I've been pretty much offline on the fanfic world, but it is deeply alarming that all of my PMs have been completely erased, and I can't even check if I've missed any, and there's a high chance I haven't even received notifications for my messages... 
          	
          	So if you've messaged me and haven't gotten a reply, I'm really sorry ): If it's anything urgent, you can try messaging again from my inbox, and if that doesn't work, my email billielaurarose@gmail.com works, too! 
          	
          	Hugs to y'all xxx

billierosiestories

Okay, after a day of research I have come to the conclusion that PMs are officially ALL GONE. WHAT. I thought they were only deleted but I can't even send or receive PMs anymore??? Honestly a heartbreaking revelation since I've disappeared into the ethers for a year or two, most of the connections I've gotten from the PMs are so friendly and kind ): Anyways, I guess the only way to reach me now is through my email and my conversation wall (if my Wattpad notifs come through, ugh), I'll try to check them when I can! I might have to reopen up my tumblr portal because of the loss of PMs, but I'm REALLY unfamiliar with it. I'll do what I can ig )):
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billierosiestories

I don't know how much Wattpad has changed during the 1-2 yrs I've been pretty much offline on the fanfic world, but it is deeply alarming that all of my PMs have been completely erased, and I can't even check if I've missed any, and there's a high chance I haven't even received notifications for my messages... 
          
          So if you've messaged me and haven't gotten a reply, I'm really sorry ): If it's anything urgent, you can try messaging again from my inbox, and if that doesn't work, my email billielaurarose@gmail.com works, too! 
          
          Hugs to y'all xxx

billierosiestories

Okay, after a day of research I have come to the conclusion that PMs are officially ALL GONE. WHAT. I thought they were only deleted but I can't even send or receive PMs anymore??? Honestly a heartbreaking revelation since I've disappeared into the ethers for a year or two, most of the connections I've gotten from the PMs are so friendly and kind ): Anyways, I guess the only way to reach me now is through my email and my conversation wall (if my Wattpad notifs come through, ugh), I'll try to check them when I can! I might have to reopen up my tumblr portal because of the loss of PMs, but I'm REALLY unfamiliar with it. I'll do what I can ig )):
Reply

billierosiestories

Hey everyone! It's been a while (:
          
          I've been working on a new fic that I really love! I thoroughly enjoy the process of creating this fic, and I realized that I might love the idea of having a beta for this specific project. So if any one of you have any experience in betaing, or have interest in helping me read over this WIP, please message me! Just a side note, there is also a chance that I might end up choosing not to have a beta for this, but I would love to see if anyone's interested! 
          
          Stay lovely y'all xx

billierosiestories

This is a PSA for the awfully dismissive health professionals, specifically the misogyny that us women face. 
          
          Dismissive medical care doesn't only happen in gynaecology, it also doesn't only happen to women, but it is especially severe in these fields. I've heard horror stories from those who live in the US, but I never expected my country, where surgical abortions are legal up to 24 weeks of the pregnancy term, to have this much internalized misogyny to be incredibly dismissive. 
          
          A few weeks ago, I went to a female gynaecologist for a sharp, stabbing pain in my left ovary that wouldn't go away for half an hour. The pain even made me debate going to the ER. Even before getting me an ultrasound, the doctor kept dismissing my pain as regular menstrual cramps, no matter how I insisted that the pain was drastically more painful and different from usual,  and the fact that I've always had incredibly painful periods with horrible symptoms and PMS. I also mentioned the fact that I've had periods for up to 16 days and down to 2 days, with cycles that have lasted over 50 days and less than 28. None of this changed her narrative of me just being an overly dramatic young woman with maybe some bad cramps now and then. 
          
          She finally scheduled me an ultrasound when I wouldn't back down. When I was done with the ultrasound, the doctor insisted that there was nothing wrong, there weren't any abnormal growths that the ultrasound could see, and said everything was normal. She didn't even mention the fact that I had a retroverted uterus, which was an informal diagnosis that was found by the ULTRASOUND TECH. (She's an absolute girl's girl, love her.) The doctor kept insisting that it must be something I'm doing wrong. Below was a literal conversation between us. [CONT'D below]

billierosiestories

@billierosiestories [CONT'D]
            
            Bottom line, even though nothing that abnormal (except my retroverted uterus, which explains A LOT) showed up on the ultrasound, there's a huge disorder that has a high chance of not being seen on ultrasound, which is endometriosis. Unless a large mass or cyst has formed due to this condition, ultrasounds can't detect abnormal uterine tissue growth outside of the uterus. 
            
            I come from a long line of women that has had strong tumor genes, and due to my mum recently being diagnosed with uterine fibroids and adenomyoma, I am starting to suspect that she might have endometriosis, which increases the chance of me having it. Both of us have many symptoms of endometriosis, but the ironic thing is endometriosis is one of the hardest conditions in gynaecology to diagnose, and it takes an average of up to 7-9 years to properly confirm because SO MANY DOCTORS DISMISS WOMEN'S PAIN. 
            
            It's so shitty and it causes so many doubt in us patients, too. I've caught myself wondering constantly if I'm just being dramatic, whether I just have an incredibly low pain tolerance, and that causes me to dismiss my OWN symptoms even though I go through it so badly.
            
            What sucks even worse is this all came from a FEMALE doctor. It's bad enough to experience misogyny, but to see it internalized made it so much worse. It leaves it up to us to advocate for ourselves, which can be a scary thing to do, and not all of us can afford to go to the doctor for SEVEN YEARS just to diagnose ONE condition. 
            
            TL;DR STOP DISMISSING WOMEN'S AND PATIENTS' PAIN. And if I get diagnosed with endometriosis in ten years, I swear I'm coming back to punch that doctor in the face.
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billierosiestories

@billierosiestories [CONT'D]
            
            This went back and forth and I kept hitting down the excuses she throws at my way, until she finds out I couldn't gain too much weight due to the sport I train in, then she doubled down on that and blamed everything wrong in my uterus on me not having enough body fat, forget the fact that my BMI is literally in the normal bracket. 
            
            After all of that, she just told me what all the other doctors did, which is take pain meds. I told her that the medications I took sometimes didn't work well and I'd still have a lot of pain. Then she proceeded to give me the same medications, even though I reminded her THREE TIMES that they were the EXACT SAME medications I'm currently taking.
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billierosiestories

[CONT'D]
            Doc: Do you eat healthy enough?
            Me: Yes, I eat plenty, I consume all the food groups with a balanced diet. 
            Doc: Hmm, then it must be you not exercising enough. You have to exercise before your period to have less cramping. 
            Me: I've only stopped exercising for a month because I tore a tendon in my ankle, but I'm a LITERAL ATHLETE and I train regularly for over nine hours a week. Even back then I've had horrible cramps and awful periods.
            Doc: Hmm, then have you considered NOT exercising?
            Me: ...what?
            Doc: You can't exercise before your period, that would cause cramping.
            Me: (wtf, so I have to exercise but not exercise?????) Look, I've always been pretty active and I've been an athlete my whole life, my body is up for the training but the cramps are consistently getting worse. 
            Doc: Ah, then have you considered gaining weight?
            Me: ...what?
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billierosiestories

Hey, all. 
          
          It's been a long few months! As I mentioned in my last message, I got into uni, and uni life hit me like a truck, lol. My apologies that I have been inactive for so long, and I'm truly sorry to those who gave constructive feedback that I usually respond to in the comments. I would still be minimally active, but I'm slowly and steadily working on my WIPs. Thanks to all who've read my works and kept supporting me when I'm gone. My heart goes out to each and every one of you (: Until the next fic, then! 
          
          Best, Billie xx

billierosiestories

Hey everyone! Today's my official one-year anniversary of being on Wattpad! 
          
          I've encountered a number of special moments up here, so I thought I would list of a few things I did that I think was notable during a year on Wattpad. In no particular order, I
          
          -Made friends (yipee!)
          -Got actual followers (tysm<3)
          -Got over 100k reads on my work (I still can't believe it)
          -Dealt with hate comments (not fun)
          -Read life-changing fics
          -Read forever scarring fics
          -Published fics that I instantly regretted (lol, they're still up here tho)
          -Started writing the sequel to Post-peace Chaos (WHOO-HOO)
          
          Being on Wattpad is definitely a very special and unique experience for me, it's another platform for creative thoughts and free expression. Although Wattpad definitely has its flaws, all in all, I did enjoy most of my interactions with all my readers and followers, and it warms my heart every time y'all give out supportive, hilarious, or constructive feedback. I even got the chance to interact frequently with a fic writer I look up to a lot up here, which I cherish very much. 
          
          Also, unrelated to the topic, I just thought that I'd share - I got into uni! I'm going to be studying in my dream school and a major I love. I wish all of you who are still studying and in school the absolute best on what you wish to achieve, regardless it's academically, creatively, or related to self-progress. Everyone of you is beautiful and unique, don't be afraid to shine (:
          
          Lastly, thanks to everyone who made this year so different and special for me! Huge thanks to all of you who supported me in any way, I love you all and hope we can all progress and grow together up here on this platform <3
          
          -Billie xxx

billierosiestories

Thought of giving my profile a bit of a makeover for a while now, and I finally did! Even if that means saying goodbye to my old icon of me doing the splits in the air ): Worth it though, I love the new one I drew, lol! Updated profile pic and description y'all!
          
          And yes, I love dorky-framed glasses *shrugs*

billierosiestories

TW: Self-harm, attempted suicide, breakdown (The first and last two paragraphs are safe, please do read, they contain important messages. The text is too long so I broke it down to two parts.) 
          
          I just wanted to send out this announcement to say: Check up on others. Not just your friends, family, or loved ones, but also those you may not have paid much attention to before, whether they seem happy, normal, or down. You never know when people need help. 
          
          A classmate of mine today had a severe mental breakdown that quickly turned into a highly physical and dangerous one. She was uncontrollable with her emotions and started yelling and screaming, hurling things every which way, and repeatedly hitting herself with a textbook. It was extremely lucky that everyone in our class was alert since she had been acting weird for a couple of days, so we already sent for help when we sensed something coming from a mile away before the breakdown started. 
          
          Our homeroom teacher, counselors, and numerous directors arrived quickly. She threatened to kill herself when one of the counselors approached her. She took the straps of her bookbag and looped them around her neck, threatening to commit suicide right there and then. When the counselor tried to talk to her calmly about it, she proceeded to head toward the door, as she could easily jump from there and we are three floors up. Everyone outside at the time had to literally barricade the door. 
          
          Thank Lord that the counselor was obviously experienced and the escalated situation calmed a little, but she was still very unstable and the whole class was quickly evacuated. It was the biggest fortune in the unfortunate that she didn't have any weapons that could do immediate damage to herself or others at the time. She is now safe back at home getting rest, and no one was physically harmed.

JayseHasNoGrace

Completely understandable. Glad you're feeling better, and that she's doing better and people were able to check in!
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billierosiestories

@JayseHasNoGrace I'm feeling ok now, though I along with everyone in the class were very shaken yesterday, it really is an experience that I believe I won't forget for a long time. She is resting at home and taking a little time off school to readjust and most of us checked in on her via text and she's better now. I do hope everything will turn out alright!
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JayseHasNoGrace

Oh no, that's quite a lot to go through! I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you're feeling okay, and that you have people to support yourself in return as well!
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billierosiestories

I just found out that I WON THE SLYTHERIN MISCONCEPTION CONTEST!!! Ahhhhhhh I'm so so psyched! 
          
          Check out the book if you fancy! It now has a cute lil contest winner sticker and I can't tell you how happy that makes me (; Also, thank you to all of my followers and readers that supported me! Love you all x
          
          -Billie
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/304623140-in-progress-drarry