Gabriel

Yo! @booksbygabriel Check this meme out, so funny: 
          https://sites.google.com/view/htwe3h23b?q=411578

The world has became so shitty now that you need peoples validation to become what they think of you. If they tell you that you are skinny, then only can you ever be skinny. If they tell you that you’re fat, then you will become fat, the body you once thought was skinny started looking like it was pouring over because of two words. 
          You all started to need other people to have depictions of you so you can have an identity because you lost it. You fucking lost it. You have no identity for your own self, you can’t even think about yourself. You need someone else to think about you, comment about you, see your body so you will be satisfied. When they tell something negative, you go on and curse them instead. Whose fault is that? Theirs for judging or you for going around begging like a pathetic fool? Needing people to have a life, a self because you on your own are not at all dependent. You don’t have a back bone for yourself, wanting someone else to become it. When they become a twisted one, you start hitting it. Its like a someone robbing an abandoned place, using those things and realising its shitty and then cursing it. Someone tells you that you are pretty, then only can you ever be pretty, someone tells you that you are ugly, and then oh my fucking god, you look like the worst human being to exist on earth, so much acne, fuck there’s them pimples,
          Someone tells you that you have good time management, you feel good about it doesnt matter if that said person came to check if you do or not, some
          Person tells you that you don’t and that said person being just a fucking hater on the internet. You start fucking panicking over the smallest mistakes of yours. Do they have cameras around your house, do they see what you are actually doing, do they see how you are fucking surviving? Someone tells you that you have no life, then you sit at the block and think about that for hours on board. You are because they thought so. 
          
          
          Just something I wrote

Oh wow, would you look at that, Haha... I haven't been online since like the 10th century BUT ANYWAYS. I need your help deciding what main quote to choose for the book I will be publishing. It's a big thing so I thought my choice would probably be the worst. Here are the options
          
          A) "Justice is a silent specter, lurking in the shadows of truth. It never forgets, and it never forgives."
          
          B) "In the shadows of silence, truth often finds its loudest voice."
          
          C) "In the quiet of our home, the loudest secrets scream the hardest."
          
          D) the truth is like the sun, you can shut it out for a while, but it ain't going away.
          
          Personally? I am stuck between A and C

I really fucking need to update my bio :). I keep getting new songs that I can die for T-T. Anyways today I HAVE LIKE THE DEEPEST URGE TO TAKE THE MOST LONGEST BATH EVER AND LIKE THE MOST FEMININE, GIRLY AND CLEAN BATH. LIKE I APPLIED A SCENTED PINK FACE MASK ON, GOT READY TO WASH MY HAIR AND SHAVING MY BODY. LIKE POP OFF ME. AND THEN GUESS WHAT I AM GONNA GO READ A BOOK IN DIM LIGHT WITH MY COFFEE AND FAVOURITE SONGS ON REPEAT

Hey, my sister just got married a few minutes ago-
          Wow, what a way to start an announcement but yeah I felt truly happy for her but I also realized one thing I am scared of changes, I panicked so hard when I got the hurtful realization that my sis has bigger priorities now, and that I might not be the first in that list. It's a thing where I live btw that the bride has to care for her groom's side more and I just feel so indifferent... Like I am happy for her, but I lost something that was one of the things I never wanted to let go of. I had a very strong connection with my sister, and now things won't be the same. She will be in contact but it won't be how we used to be. It's like those times when you lost the dearest, best friend of yours, and you are still in contact but things just aren't the same. I held in my panic attack the whole time, I was like "Nuh uh, I ain't crying now at all." but sadly my mother kept going on and on about how she was going now, like wtf... I lost it completely.
          
          Tell me, have you every lost something that was very dear to you, and you just didn't want it to let go?

I just went through a full panic moment- and broke down in the bathroom :) After that, I decided to delete the whole book I have been writing, {not the fanfics, my other one which I will publish as an actual book}. I am starting it again now-

I JUST GOT COLD COFFEE, AND ISTG THE COFFEE EFFECT IS WORKING- AND I FEEL AWESOME AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, LIKE IS THERE SOMETHING U GUYS DO SOMETIMES THAT JUST MAKES U SO HAPPY?- MINE IS COFFEE.

BRO DOES ANYONE FEEL LIKE THE WORLD IS GOING SO FAST I JUST GOT INTO THE SENSE THAT MY SIS IS ACTUALLY MARRYING! LIKE OH MY GOSH, EVERYTHING FEELS SO SO SO FAST AND QUICK!!!

Another poem I made, which I honestly based it on myself.
          
          She feels nothing- Like an empty book that once had a story of it's own. Emotions buried deep inside until her mind decided to take the throne. 
          Hiding everything behind a dark brick wall, so no one notices a flaw.
          She was told not to complain, since every one of them had it worse. Now her mind mutes her in hard times, not wanting her emotions to disperse. 
          She wears a face made of stone, wanting nothing but her mind to leave her alone. She forgets that she had a life to begin with, and starts to bury herself within. Now she's nothing but flesh and bones, her emotions are long gone.

@Euphoric_Bvnny Assalam alaykum <3