Person1313
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The story overall is amazing. A few thing to think about is maybe a signifier for who's POV it is and when you write to keep the capitalization consistent in chapter 1 with the razorfins and in chapter 4 with shardlings also try not to start sentences with 'and' like "and that's not mentioning the ones who are.." in chapter 3. in chapter 5 the paragraph that start with "it's no secret" has a quotation error. Overall it's coming along great and is an amazing story so far!!
booksgivemelife444
Thank you so much!! This has been really helpful. I’ve tried to get a few family members to read it, but they’re just like “yeah it’s really good,” and while that’s nice to hear it doesn’t actually help me. So thank you! Have a good day/night
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