What kind of mis-matched mate story would you write?
There are human relationships that turn abusive that may have some elements in common with werewolf romances. Using the mis-matched mates stories, well researched ones could show warning signs.
There would also be werewolves without mates (or who lost theirs) who could delude themselves with a mate fantasy, or be enough of a manipulative user to fake it. Because she wasn't who he needed, she could never perfectly satisfy the fantasy all the time. Damaging the fantasy could be punished.
When she finds her true mate ( or gets found by him) She won't be so trusting the second time around. He will be posessive and jellous too; there will be other similarities. What makes this relationship different?
Why did she choose to stay so long?
Why did she choose to leave?
Note: If it is not a choice to stay, if you strip her of choice by calling it 'battered women's syndrome" or anything else that robs her of will and choice...then you deny such women the very idea that leaving is a choice...a possibility.
If staying is not a choice, then leaving is not a choice either! Please do not rob your characters of wit and will.