Read your story. A little blunt but other than that okay. I think you should work on developing characters a little more and making them individuals. Try making a sheet of their personalties before you start writing. Your stories also go quickly and I get lost. Fix that and you will be good
Hahaha(: I get that a lot. I'm a very blunt person in real life so hopefully now that I have an editor my stories will improve! Also, I will try your personalities sheet thing. Sounds helpful. Thanks for the reads(: