Hey guys since I don't have friends I don't have anyone to talk to so I wanna talk to you guys.
Right now I'm on my bathroom floor now calm, but I was crying, and I just wanted to tell y'all why. I just have to tell someone I'm pretty lonely. Lately I've been having problems with my emotions (i have not gotten my period) I've been having these struggles since I was little, that was one of the reasons I got bullied, for a few years my emotions have been calm and normal. But these emotions came back strong these past months, I catch myself screaming at my mom, being mad, crying, all of a sudden happy, crazy and the list goes on. I can't seem to control it, I have lost many friendships because of my damn emotions, there were times where I would go in the corner of the classroom and have a panic attack, I would throw up a lot, and I had depression. I would starve myself to fit to what people wanted to see. Over quarantine I got tics, and my head hurts like a bitch, and looking at a freaking computer screen is not helping my headache. A week ago we went to the doctor, and turns out I am bipolar oh, and even better I have bipolar depression. I just hate my life, I feel sorry for the people that were friends with me. Also since I have swim classes everyday, everyone is always giving me judgemental looks when I have tics, sometimes I make really loud noises but I can't control it, I am crying right now locked in the bathroom, I am really trying to control my breathing, but I can't everyone is asleep, and I am pretty sure y'all are too. If you read this thank you for taking your time on my stupid problems. Sorry have a good night.