a doyoung simp😃

I'm gonna update y'all on what is going on in my life even tho no one cares but oh well I'm happy so‍♀️ I've been trying to make friends irl, I almost got myself a bf but the dude one day got bored of me and so he stopped texting me so I tried to text him twice and by the tone he was using when texting me I could tell he's done with me so I didn't text him a third timeat least tho I didn't get attached to him emotionally bc I knew he would be going back to his county anyways  so that's a plus i guess idk‍♀️ OHH I ALSO GOT A NEW TATTOO AND NOW I HAVE 2✨ oh and I entered adulthood 2 months ago and I can tell u all adulthood sucks even more that teenagehood.

Today's my birthday (ノ^_^)ノ

I just baked some homemade cinnamon cookies for the fisrt time and they came out fire 

In the past 38 hours I've slept maximum 1 and a half hours and I'm not even tired

I was peeing peacefuly and a spider decided to attack me, I almost got a panic attack and I feel bugs crawling all over my body, life sucks. 

I need to pack my suitcases because I'm going to Germany in basically 3 days and I've put 1/4 of the things I need to pack in front of me so that I'll get the motivation to do it but I still don't have motivation༎ຶ‿༎ຶ

I was just scrolling through tiktok and my phone suddenly stopped playing the sounds of the tiktok. So I went to other apps and checked and for a moment I could play some music but now I can't. And in less than a week I'm going abroad what the fuck am I supposed to do now

Update: It's 5.15 a.m. and I still can't sleep. I honestly don't know what to do, I even took a sleeping pill an hour ago but it did nothing at all 

I don't usually drink coffee but today I drank not one but two of them and it's 03.55 and I can't sleep. And tomorrow, meaning the 24th of june, I have to go to an event and my dark circles are going to be horrendous, unless I sleep all day today, yay 

I wanna update on my life a bit cuz I don't have friends to talk to so yeah 
           
          I've been feeling really bad and unstable mentally lately for some reasons. I'm turning to an adult in almost a month and I've been rethinking my whole life basically and like I'm having an existential crisis idk? Like, I feel like I'm loosing interest in a lot of things and I'm always on edge. I've lost contact with my best friend of 9 years and it's not like I'm not trying to reach out to her, it's like she's completely ignoring me and I get that she has her own life in another country but I just feel like I've done something to her and I can't talk to her about it because she isn't talking to me. Also, the only friend that I made in the country I've been living for 4 years now, is moving to another country, yay!!:) Also there's this dude in my school that is an absolute d1ck for no reason at all and not to me either but to my dog, he's never seen my dog irl only when I post photos of him on my instagram, every time I post my dog he makes a comment like "oh is he still alive?" "isn't he d3@d yet?" like excuse me bitch wtf?? And my dog isn't even aggressive or anything he's literally an angel he sleeps all day, pees, poops, eats, plays etc. He's a shih tzu btw and he's adorable, every time I look at him I wanna cry from cuteness overload:') And also, I have been feeling awful with my own self.
          
          I just have no one to talk to and idk what to do with my life at this point‍♀️