@cherrycola137
WHATZ UP FUCKERZ
i am REBRANDING !!! deleting all my old storiez and starting anew and shit !!!! i love u all and hope u have a terrible summer !!
we love hinting at possibly being a demiboy and my family members say "you don't think you're a *boy*, do you?" like it's a bad thing and me just lying, saying "nO i- i don't *have* a gender, i'm not a girl *or* a boy !!!1!11"
pls i just want to get a binder from my friend that's all i want
(pls my wattpad has just died i feel like deleting all my stories and starting from the beginning again)
also how the hell i have 8 followers here yet my insta has 68(saving the 69th for my friend)
shameless insta plug: @//stale.spaghetti.noodle
ahaha should i or should i not delete the last announcement bc it sounds like i was gonna kill myself but really i was just thinking abt deactivating my account and maybe causing some physical damage to myself but i ended up doing neither so it's fine ig
<<<VENT AND TRIGGERING TOPICS>>>
i hate myself, why the fuck am i like this i want to remove anything and everything that has to do with gender from my body i want to kill myself i don't want these feelings anymore i wish i was a normal fucking girl and not some tranny that can't even use her assigned pronouns what the fuck are they/them and why are they mine why do i like those words why do i like more than one gender why do i want to be with her i should be with him i want this all to stop the scars on my wrists aren't enough the mental torture isn't enough the misgendering isn't enough i deserve pain i'm a defect please someone kill me i wish to go missing just to be found hanging in the woods i wish that i wasn't like this i wish i could be normal but i'm not and it's killing me
i'm sorry
i'll stop
you don't need me, no one does, so i won't be here anymore
ahahAH your bitch is bACK mother fuckers and bOY do i have nOTHING TO SAY
althoughidohavelikefournewstoryideasandmightdeleteflwrgrlbcidontrllylikeitnemor-
N E WAES
I'LL PROBABLY WRITE ANOTHER ATWRM CHAPTER SOON OK BYEEEE
eyyyy i'm getting grounded bc my mom founf out i've been skipping all my fourth quarter classes so now i have to do makeup work and i'm not allowed in my room unless it's to sleep skeet skeet
i also now have to go to bed at 8:30 amd wake up at 7 to do nonstop work until my mom says it's enough for the day!
now i have to be a "social butterfly" when i'd MUCH RATHER BE an antisocial moth
GOOD DAY MY DEAR IDIOTS
<<VENT>>
i realise that since i'm the youngest in my family they treat me like a baby. oh i'm having a mental breakdown? poor baby needs to be cooed at and pitied. having an identity crisis? she's just a kid she'll get over it. staying up for days on end due to insomnia caused by stress? aw, pobre niña. asking you to please use my preferred name and pronouns? denied.
they honestly don't care and i hate it. i just want to end it and live a normal life where i don't hate everything about myself and where some of my family members don't repeat things over and over again because "oh, i can't love you?" i'm pretty sure being called a "little baby poopsie pie" is not affection.
tbh i'd prefer to be mute so i don't have to answer their agonizingly stupid questions or say whatever the fuck they want me to say. i'm embarrassed to be related to some of these people.
i tell them my preferred name and they take it from dani to danielle. i tell them my preferred pronouns and they still use she/her. i can't fucking take it anymore.
thank you for listening to my ted talk
@cherrycola137 Same, though I'm the middle child. But, since my older siblings are 7 to 15 years older then me- I basically get treated like the youngest. Not to mention that I'm the only girl out of my 5 brothers. Though, an identity crisis isn't the thing they don't take seriously. It's my sexuality they don't care about. Actually- My brothers and my friends are the only people that actually believe me. (Just in case you're wonder, I came out to my family as pansexual.) But, I guess I can't really blame them. I'm still trying to figure out what exactly is my sexuality. I came out to them as pansexual since I really do believe that I am. Though, I could be polysexual. Though, my mom thinks it's just a phase. Since I live with my aunt and her girlfriend. So yeah qwq. Though, I actually am also having an identity crisis that has been going on for so long. You see- I was born a girl... But feel more like a boy. I would rather be a boy then a girl. In fact, since I can't really say anything about that yet to anyone. I just make my persona and fursona boys. And, it makes me happy that way. Anyways- But for you, just wait. It might take sometime to take you seriously but just know that you got us to support you and you can always talk to us. :)
@cherrycola137 I'm struggling with the 'my pronouns are different now' issue too, try to sit them down and talk to them. If that doesn't work, yell at them, yell at them that if they don't like who you are then they can't be your parents. And if that doesn't work, don't leave the room, keep telling it over and over, eventually they will listen. We all love you, (no homo but yes homo) when your older you can leave your terrible excuse of a family behind, and it'll be better then, I promise.
@cherrycola137 I care about you, and I have the same problem with the 'I'm the youngest and no one takes me seriously', I deal with it by looking at them with a straight face and saying "don't believe me? I dare you, I fucking dare you to not believe me, if you don't take me seriously I'm going to leave. Just watch me, I will. I'm not joking around, I'm serious." No laughing, just completely serious, that usally works.
nobody:
not a single soul:
me: "accidentally" dehydrates myself so i can play with almost fainting every time i stand up
i want die. today's been fukin horrible it started w/me waking up at 4 am after not sleeping for over 72 hours to vomit bc i hadn't eaten anything either, then legit anything i do gives me a headache, and i don't go back to sleep bc fuk that, then i have a mental breakdown bc i haven't taken my meds in a while, then i faint in the shower bc too much steam + asthma = nono not good. and this entire time i haven't told anyone abt this but honestly i don't think my family or friends need to know bc i don't want to worry them w/the amount of bullshit i've been through today. anyway i'm slightly worried that i may die sooner rather than later :)
@cherrycola137 no no, girl go get help. Please. Go eat something, you deserve to eat. Eat something small, that's progress. Eat something a little bigger each day, more progress. Please go seek help, I beg you.
