ThirdieFirst
Nice story, some errors, some stuff don't make sense so proofread your text for it may confuse the readers but its agood story the emotions can be felt and the first person view was clearly stated giving many adjectives can formulate an imagination for the reader what do I know I'm a bad writer
coresteneS
Actually, youre a good writer, I clearly understand the emotions and the your story haha, so don’t down yourself about writing☺️.
coresteneS
Thank you for reading my story, and yes I’ll proofread it so I can edit the text. Thanks , really now I know what the result of my work ☺️