corupzztion
this message may be offensive
I'm ngl I'm lowkey crying rn, I just turned 16 this month and I was bored so I re-downloaded wattpad. I scrolled and scrolled through all my past saved books and I just can't help but be so overwhelmed with nostalgia. I remember being an 11 year old staying up all night on her hold beat up phone that barely worked, just reading who knows what about the current hyper fixation she had. it made me so sad like actually, thinking about how that would never happen again. that I'd never be able to experience that same feeling I had. I was just living in my own world inside my mind but I'd never been happier. I miss it so fucking bad, like I'm bawling rn. I just wanna go back so bad. I want to be in that same head space as I used to, just in my own head but I was happy. now school is genuinely killing me. it still boggles me that I'm like actually 16 now, and almost a fully functioning adult when my mind is still stuck thinking like an 11 year old. it's weird that I'm now the age that I used to lie about and imagine myself as when reading these fanfics. turns out it's not as fantastic as I made it out to be. fuck. I want to go back so bad, you guys. it was like I lived so many lives while just being stuck inside my room and scrolling through wattpad books, maybe that caused my personality disorder but whatever. I wish I could just be 11, dumb, unaware and in her own head again. I would do anything. I miss it
