I am currently trying to read your book the fallen and the deranged and I am trying so so so hard not to love the fact that Mai is giving into pleasure to ignore the pain of her past, OH FOR GOD'S SAKE I CAN'T TELL IF SHIGARKIK IS SECRETLY PRAYING TO THE HIGH HEAVENS THANKING THEM FOR THIS MOMENT OR IF HE'S CURSING UNDER HIS BREATH ANGRY THAT MAI IS LITERALLY BEGGING HIM TO F*CK HER!!!!!!! Not I do not see anything wrong with having a kink but this is insane she's about to give up her first time in a moment of fear and pleasure!!! Not exactly the first time a girls wants I mean why is shigaraki even entertaining the thought of f*cking her, I genuinely can't tell if he hates the girl or loves her it's so back and forth I'm trying to figure out if he's a masochist with sadistic tendencies or a sadist so desperate for any sort of human contact he mistakes pain for love. Given his back story, I wouldn't blame him if it's the latter. But seriously does he love or hate Mai?
