hi, Wattpad. ٩(ˊ〇ˋ″)و
after a great, grand ordeal and a likely questionable future for much of the foreseeable future, i dared myself to defy my endless indecision. i changed my mind once more. yes. once more. again—as you do.
i will publish something.
…
eventually.
i have felt empty since the dawn of this year. after distress and devastation struck, this cosmic void grew too large for me to dismiss. few of my plans for the future, nor my desire to actualize them, have survived the ravages of time this year—and, as the days grow slower and longer, the heat and the pain threaten to consume my profound desire for the life of vision and purpose that i have never lived. lest i succumb to such crisis as the idealization of my eventual oblivion and existence as a mere memory, as i have for years, i have felt the need to grow nearer to my lifeline when i was 7; when i was 14; when i was 17.
the pen.
how you and i differ is that you likely have a much firmer hand and an even sharper mind than i. in for a penny; in for a pound. right, beauty? well, not i. the razor’s edge of this brain only cuts. if ever she was once struck by flint and lit fires, i must have starved them of their oxygen. she doesn’t carve monuments.
for now. the pyrotechnics when she bursts alive is a wildfire that parts the seas of the forests and renews the earth.
and me.
i wish you ease and endless love. enjoy yourselves and stay safe, comfortable, healthy and rich in ideas, intention and grace. amid great moral decay and seizures of peace, autonomy and sovereignty, worldwide, the most radical act of defiance today is to live well—in the richest, most complete extent of ourselves.
shall we all be renewed and reaffirmed—and discover more reasons to be. not only today, but everyday.
see you around?
m