DELUBLU.

The release of bnha season 7 and avoiding toxic fan online have reignited my love for the series. Who knew that not being chronically online could make such a difference?
          All jokes aside, I'm starting to realize how irrational it was to drop an anime cause the "fandom ruined it for me". There's a 'block' and 'not interested' options for a reason. Click those or step back from social media for a bit. No one can ruin anything unless you let them.
          But to be honest, a part of me sought after that sort of content because it gave me a sense of superiority—"Thank God I'm not like those fans." But the joke's on me; I'm part of the problem. Engaging with that content, weather good or bad, pushes it further into the algorithm, further spreading that negativity. What I've learned is that seeking validation outside yourself can only do so much. If you solely rely on external validation, you'll always end up running on empty. Seeing those fans make fools of themselves validated me because I'm not like them. Aw, do you want a cookie? There’s no point. Maybe that's why so many people love that content, even if they claim to hate it. I used to think I hated it, but I loved that feeling of superiority. That’s why the content keeps circulating online cause people can't help but engage with it. Ultimately, it's a waste of time. Yes, we should acknowledge that some parts of the fandom are problematic, but we don’t need to dwell on it. Instead, we should just enjoy the content for what it is: a superhero anime about a bright-eyed boy who wants to be the no.1 hero, his buff skeleton mentor, and his grenade bastard friend.

I love the fact that I have no followers. No followers = no pressure. I actually prefer not having followers, as I’m only working on this one story, and it would be disappointing for them if I didn’t produce more content. However, if anyone still wishes to follow, that’s perfectly fine as well. Just know this will be my only one.

I'm doing literally anything BUT writing the story.
          I made character analysis after analysis, character bios, book cover, reading other fanfics, planning out the story, more character analysis, and now I'm making a fuking OST PLAYLIST?....instead of writing the actual STORY.
          And I'm not even halfway done with the first chapter yet.
          
          Here's what I should do instead of getting distracted:
          □ write at least 10 chapters.
          □ edit. edit. edit. and edit some more.
          □ make an ost to follow along with the scenes.
          □ repeat.
          i'm planning on publishing a chapter weekly once i'm over halfway done w/ it.
          
          I only give myself 30 minutes to an hour to work on this daily since I have other priorities and this is more like a fun side project for me so I shouldn't be wasting time on trivial details when I haven't even written a whole chapter yet. Good grief.