I am an investigator for hire. I specialise (or am technically legally bound to specialise) in planted-based and animal crime. I usually operate in the Metropolis of Tanbridge located in the south of England, but I am willing to travel. I have been hired for over 9 cases in my short time since leaving my parents' fridge, and have solved almost 6 of them. I am a dab hand with lost pets and stolen roses, but my powers of detection are usually best served tackling the city's growing problem of illogical biology. As an item of illogical biology myself, (Google sentient tofu for more info) I am well-equipped to help you handle the challenges that come with encountering things you aren't used to seeing. For problems with talking birds, aggressive species of grass, flying house plants or anything else whose biology doesn't seem quite right to you, I'm your man.