emma

writing gaydar is exhausting. i wish i could be proud of it. excuse whatever mess my profile and that book have become. it's a work in progress, really. i have no clue what i'm doing and it's making me incredibly angry. 

i may rewrite gaydar. 
          i'd of course leave the book up on my page and start writing it from a different one, because it would be nice to keep it there. but i just look back at old chapters and hate it. 
          they're so...disorganized? i flatout had blaine say she was an only child. she has a brother for gods sake. 
          my filler was stupid, it should have been worked on much more. other parts i just don't like. 
          
          so, yeah. i either wanna revise the whole thing (which is a lot more frickin effort. less time. but more effort.) or rewrite it (much more time but probably a lot more fun!!). idk. decisions, decisions. 

i had mentioned my poetry book, and am thinking of publishing certain writings. it was personal to me, but my style has changed for poetry. hm.

going to be,,, "revamping" my account. so, uh, prepare. i have no clue where im going or what im doing with it. just want to make some changes. i'll have updates. 

wattpad update = sO mUch gliTchIng??

gaydar is coming i promise!! it's just taking forever and im so so so sorry!!! i will have my excuse in the chapter. i promise i didn't just decide to vanish. 

something y'all don't know is that i have one draft on wattpad. one. and it's full of poetry, and some of it is just one line that i needed to get out of my head. it's for when i need to say something but can't find anyone to tell or anywhere's else to say it. because, during october, some stuff happened and i didn't watch everything i said. people told me "start writing again. you haven't written poems in a while", or "that's what writing is for". and i started writing. so that book will never be published. at least not as a whole. and not yet. not for a long time. i think it's hella good for me. health wise. i wouldn't let anyone read it unless they were close or i wanted them to know something - whether it's about them or something else. no matter what it all isn't read by anyone but me. it's up to me if i show you. it's personal, it shouldn't need to be published. maybe someday when i reflect on life, it'll come up and i'll post some of my favourites. but for now, i don't wanna post anything. 
          
          i thought maybe you'd all wanna know this little fact? idk, maybe it's cool to you guys too?

im gonna start writing more Gaydar i promise!! i hate procrastination ;((

in My Sweet Summer, i changed Ashton's faceclaim. i just didn't think the current one suited him well enough. 

guess who got the phone!!!!!!