Hii, I stumbled upon your story ISD and i really liked it.
When you said you attempted suicide and then mentioned your abusive ex, and although I've heard similar stories thousand times till i became somehow immune to emotions but when i read your words idk why but i felt a sharp pang of pain in my stomach.
I- i feel like i have to say this;
We're not placed on this earth for nothing, every single one of us have a reason, a purpose to live for. And i hope you find yours soon. Your a strong one, I really hope you'll find someone who can help lift the burden off your shoulders.