Samhainiac

I am simply assuming you didn't notice my comment left on your work The Carnival of Venice, which was incredible, possibly one of the best short stories I've read so far. Yet even the greatest writers received a bit of constructive criticism, and I would like to offer some to you, but only if you'll take it and work with the notes I made for you. If interested feel free to send me a message either here, on twitter {{@Samhainiac}}, or even via my facebook page {{@TheRealSamhainiac}}. Of course I wouldn't dream of forcing my assistance on to you, so contacting me is entirely your decision, great story over all, and feel free to follow me on any of the aforementioned sites I provided you with, it would be greatly appreciated. Thank you, and remember to always party hard, and that you can't spell funeral without fun™.

Samhainiac

not a problem at all
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enwells01

@Samhainiac Thank you!
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Samhainiac

@enwells01 first things first, you might think about lengthening your description a bit. because currently there's not much describing the actual story, also you might want to change the title to Il Carnevale do Venezia, just because that's the Italian translation of the Carnival of Venice. As for names, if you're aiming for Italian I would suggest that Katallyna should be changed to Catalina, and Michael should probably be changed to Michelangelo. In the story when the heroin is talking about the street lights you might want to call them street lamps instead because it's more time accurate, and finally when Catalina is at the dance there's a slight misspelling, you accident wrote though when you meant thought. I had more but I realized that those were perhaps your locations proper grammar and once I realized that I struck them off. All in all great story, those are just some little things you might want to look into. Of course you don't have to, it's your story. I hope I was some sort of help. keep doing what you're doing, because you're very talented.
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