@IRONMan583 STRESS /strɛs/
2. subject to pressure or tension.
3. Cause mental or emotional strain or tension in.
synonyms:overstretch, overtax, push to the limit, pressurize, pressure, burden
The pressure I am subjected to is to survive via food, water, and air. Unfortunately, it's a lot of effort to eat every day and drink a healthy amount of water. I have mental strain because I must try to understand your words and have a suitable reaction and response. As you can see, this can be very mentally straining and demanding. This is why it would obviously be better off dead, in an eternal rest. But unfortunately, I have the burden of the effect that would have on my friends and family. Since pain isn't real because my existence was pure chance and death is inevitable anyway, I can can survive solely for other people. There is no use for emotions like 'happiness' and 'anger'. This is why I am stressed, but also content with my existence.