eris loxe

Sometimes unfinished business is better left unfinished. It bothers your soul for a while, but in the long run it’s good for you. Leave the negativity behind mid sentence. There’s nothing more to be said. 

We can teach ourselves to not cry over people who chose to walk away from us, but how do we deal with the memories they left behind? How do we deal with the emptiness out of the parts of ourselves they took with them?
          
          –

I always keep a straight face no matter how much of my world is falling apart, hoping that no one would see through my façade and ask that one question that I know will break me.
          
          "Are you okay?"
          
          I guess I'm just convincing myself that I'm strong, because really, all I want is for them to see the tears I'm holding back. To read the words I can't bring myself to utter. How I wish I can just let them in. That I can just surrender the battle so I can sit somewhere and tend to my wounds. How I wish I have it in me to drop my guard and accept the help I know I deserve.
          
          —

Unpopular opinion:
          
          Sometimes all you can do is try. Even if you succeed or not, trying is already a very brave thing to do. Don't be afraid to be proud of yourself for trying.
          
          
          

I don’t know 
          if I should celebrate 
          the days 
          where I am not 
          sad enough 
          to write poems 
          
          because why 
          am I even a poet 
          if I can 
          no longer 
          bleed words? 
          
          on my empty days
          
          where 
          do
          my 
          words 
          go?
          
          when I’m not drowning in ink
          
          where 
          am
          I?
          

What isn't mine, I wont try to take it.  What is mine, I won't let anyone take it.
          
          -

Hindi na pipilitin pang magtugma,
          dahil ikaw ang tulang ginawa ko ng 
          "malaya"

i will always love you in thousand sunrises. and an endless tomorrow. i’d love the shape of your demons. and your unsweetened morning coffees. the messed up annotated books. i’d love you still. even on your worse. or when your night haunts your scarred past— i’ll show you how the stars hugged the night sky so calmly, so soothing that we became constellations in metaphors. or the way achilles love patroclus as his own life. and darling, i’d love you more when all you could do is to not give me up because love stays even if home gets dark. because love stays exactly where the home is. 
          and we’re still here, braving the storms. 
          until forever becomes a lifetime with you.
          
          

even if it won’t be us.
          i’d still keep on hoping
          that maybe in the next life,
          maybe in the next universe,
          maybe in the next book,
          or in the next page.
          it would be us.
          you and me.
          carved on the moon.
          and stars.

Kung ito na ang huli, ayaw kong pumikit. Ayaw kong sayangin ang bawat segundo na puwede pa kitáng yakapin nang mahigpit. Ayaw kong sa huli ay hindi ko masabi kung gaano kitá inibig—at iniibig.