esha_rai

chapter one of shattered crimson: the masquerade unveiled is out along with prologue a blurb, give it a read and share your opininons  
          	https://www.wattpad.com/story/376348302-shattered-crimson-the-masquerade-unveiled 
          	and if you like it add it to your library or follow me on stckme for more updates

esha_rai

also, @nahiabbatahido, I hope you won’t mind me offering some suggestions, because I think they could elevate the book even further. First, I noticed that this is a new release, and the chapters were fantastic, but at times I felt it would have been helpful to have clear indications of whose POV each chapter was from. It’s a small addition, but it would make it easier for readers to connect. Also, I feel that since the book is written in past tense, the time period should reflect that as well, rather than leaning towards the present.
          
          Towards the end, things seemed a bit rushed. I would have loved 3-4 more chapters showing how their lives evolved, how their feelings grew deeper and more mature. Bhavuk, in particular, was such an intriguing character, and I was eager to see more of him towards the end. The focus shifted more to Manasvi, but I believe Bhavuk deserved some additional development in those final chapters.
          
          Instead of small time jumps like “two years later,” “four years later,” I think a more significant leap—like “eight years later”—with flashbacks would be more engaging and seamless. You could explore how they met new friends, how life changed, and how they both matured.
          
          One last suggestion: Aesthetics. In today’s world, young readers are drawn to visual appeal like no other. Banners, posters, chapter aesthetics—these details make a huge difference. No offense, but the Instagram pictures didn’t quite match the aesthetic vibe I was expecting. I think with some adjustments, the overall presentation could be even more compelling.
          
          Please don’t take any of this the wrong way! I only want to help because this book truly deserves the best. If you need assistance with any of this, I’d be more than happy to help! You can reach out here or on Instagram.

nahiabbatahido

@esha_rai sureeee
• Reply

esha_rai

@nahiabbatahido Consider me when you think about giving this book a makeover! Share your ig account, so I can share you some ideas, and let’s create something amazing together! only if you want. no pressure.
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esha_rai

@nahiabbatahido its okay to feel that sometimes, take a break and then re-draft it, i sure so many reader like me wanted to re-read this book particularly
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esha_rai

this is for @nahiabbatahido, first of all you are an amazing writer and thats a no doubt, I read your book "With Mangoes and Chocolate". and let me tell you the story line is just amazing, I rarely write reviews, but this book absolutely deserves one. The banter, the emotions—it all felt so vivid. Initially, when I started reading, I thought it would be another high school cliché, but I kept going (thank goodness!), because if I hadn’t, I would have regretted it forever. This book is incredibly relatable, especially Manasvi’s character. I saw so much of myself in her. And Bhavuk—he’s refreshing. Unlike so many male characters who waver about relationships, he’s clear about what he wants, and that’s such a rarity.
          
          Without giving too many spoilers, I’ll just say—the story is simply wonderful. And oh, the flirting! I couldn’t stop smiling and blushing like a teenager the entire time. Seriously!
          
          Let me share a line that moved me deeply: “He was the swiftness of dragonfly wings for me. The calmness of museums and echoes of great halls for me.” I literally cried when I read that—it touched me in a way few lines ever have. And the letter! Oh, and another favorite: “She was the sting of a good high five.” Those lines will stay with me for a long time.
          
          I’m trying not to give away major spoilers, but these moments hit me right in the soul. I feel like I could re-read this book over and over again.

nahiabbatahido

@esha_rai love you so much. Will consider everything you've said. You're inspiring as a person;) thank you so much
• Reply

esha_rai

@nahiabbatahido As for your questions:
            
            No, I don’t think Vihaan, or anyone else for that matter, was the reason. In any relationship, it's up to both individuals to decide how they nurture it and how much effort they put in. Ultimately, it’s their own insecurities that overpower the relationship. We can’t blame them, though—those teenage years bring a whirlwind of doubt and uncertainty. No one has it easy during that time, and we all make mistakes. But at that point, Bhavuk was losing himself, so perhaps it was necessary.
            
            Arbaz is my kindred spirit. Initially, I thought he was creepy and borderline psychotic, but as the story evolved, I came to admire him. His psychoanalytical mind is something I love. I don’t understand how people overlook that he was like an elder brother to Manasvi—he had that protective core.
            
            Oh, and that scene where Arbaz and Bhavuk meet, and she asks for his opinion, stands out to me. And yes, I know I’ve mentioned this before, but you should definitely consider an eight-year gap, followed by flashbacks. It would add such an intriguing and compelling layer to the story. Trust me, it’ll captivate readers.
• Reply

esha_rai

good things should be appreciated. Oh no, that's cruel to hate a character. People need to learn that there is no one flawless; perfection is a myth. Everyone around us needs to accept people as they are, with no conditions attached. There can be improvement, but changing a person or expecting them to be flawless is their fault—it's a mindset issue. 
            Your work stands out in a way that's refreshing and distinct from much of what we read today, don't let anyone tell you otherwise, believe yourself any your story will speak for themselves. It’s unique, innovative, and truly deserves a wider audience. You should consider redrafting, even if it exceeds word limits sometimes, because the emotions that resonate with the reader matter far more than constraints.
• Reply

nahiabbatahido

Thank youu for reading my book. don't forget to vote & comment ;) thanks againnnn

nahiabbatahido

@esha_rai awwwwWWWW only if you'd know how happy that made me feel! That's awesome if I could make you smile with my works! And tysm if you're thinking about writing a review, will be waiting ✨
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esha_rai

@nahiabbatahido I seldom write reviews or comment on the books I read, but yours was distinctly different and left a lasting impression. I'll be posting my review very soon. Just so you know, it's one of the best I've read so far, though I have a few minor observations here and there."
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nahiabbatahido

Let me know what you think about it
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MagicalNarrative

Hey! I'm thrilled to announce that my book "Enchanted Journey" is now published on Wattpad!  It's a romantic love story filled with unexpected twists and heartfelt moments. I’d love for you to check it out and share your thoughts. If you enjoy it, please follow me on Instagram @MagicalNarrative for updates and more stories. Your support means everything to me! Thank you so much!
          
          - Arranged Marriage
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          - Age Gap
          - Romcom
          - Opposites Attract
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          https://www.wattpad.com/story/373052493?utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=share_writing&wp_page=create&wp_uname=MagicalNarrative

serenitymeadows

Heyy!! If you are interested in indian dark romance book,  my friend just started a dark romance book that takes place on university campus 
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Ruhani_Gupta

Heya!
          
          I hope you are doing well.
          
          Apologies for sliding into your profile, but do check out my story if time permits. It will mean a lot!❤️
          
          It's a slow and subtle blooming arranged story with a realistic backdrop and real, relatable characters that you would certainly connect to.
          
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