i know it's over, and it never really began, but in my heart it was so real.
i started a relationship while knowing about your reputation, i just ignored it and trusted that you wouldn't break my heart like you broke all of the other girls'. you made me promise that i wouldn't leave you and i agreed. you kept telling how much you cared about me and how beautiful i was. i felt WANTED for once in my life. i didn't know that i would be the one ending things, i always thought it'd be you, bc i wasn't enough or something. i didn't want to break up with you, i felt awful about it too, i promised i wouldn't leave you. we didn't speak for weeks, i didn't leave my house. people were texting me left and right saying that you made out with another girl several different times. when i come back to school, i find out that you're telling people we were never dating and that i was making it all up. when i confronted you about the cheating, you denied everything, and continued telling me how much you still cared about me. when i confronted you about the stuff you were saying, you said, "yes i'm telling people you were making up everything bc i didn't want people to know that it was you that ended things." i forgave you, i really did. you hug me everyday, and i don't want that to stop bc i still want to feel wanted and loved. i'm afraid i'll never feel the way you made me feel. i don't regret things but sometimes i wish i would've walked away at the start and left things at hello.