ْ

القطط السوداء نوعي المفضل.

Between pain and survival, I stand alone, torn between a heart that refuses to let go and a soul that can no longer this weight.
          Pain is no longer a passing feeling for me; it has become a harsh homeland I was forced to live in—draining me slowly, consuming what remains of my peace. I used to cling to it because traces of you were there, because it held echoes of what I once loved… but the more I held on, the deeper I drowned.
          As for survival, it was never the easy escape I imagined. It was a painful decision, like tearing something out of my chest with my own hands and walking away while bleeding in silence.
          I chose survival not because I became strong, but because I collapsed to the point of helplessness—because staying in that pain was a delayed death, exhausting me day after day without mercy.
          I know that when I survive, I will lose so much—I will lose what I loved, what I was used to, what I once wished for… but I will not lose myself anymore.
          This is who I am—between pain and survival: a heart that longs to stay, and a soul that screams to leave… and I choose survival, even if the price is that my heart breaks forev.

عجبتني فكرة أقيم السنين يلي عشتوهن .

I wish my luck matched the thickness of my hair.
          I wish my luck matched the wideness of my eyes.
          I wish my luck matched the greenness of my eyes.
          I wish my luck matched the fairness of my skin.
          I wish I were as lucky as the beauty that God has blessed me with. Why does bad luck accompany me?

طلع خاين حبيبي

يَا صِبْرُ قُلْ لِي هَلْ أَنَا أَيُّوبُ؟
          أَمْ أَنْنِي فِي لَوْعَتِي يَعْقُوبُ؟

تتراكم فوقي الأمور حتى أصبح عند البوح مختل وأكتفي بـ " لا أعلم " ، بينما تحدث براكين فيضة بداخلي تتدفق بحرارة، أعيش كأنني طائراً محبوس في قفصاً ، يتوسل الآخرين لإفلاته فقد هلك ويحتاج لسمائه.

أتقنت أربع لغات منذُ صغري
          ولم استطع التعبير بواحد منهم  عما بداخلي.

اجتني جلطة إدراك راح ينعادون تواريخ أسوأ شيء مريت بينو بـ 2025

مرت سنة ونص وأنا بونيني.