Augustine

Underneath my outside face
          There's a face that none can see.
          A little less smiley
          A little less sure
          

When you look in his eyes do you think of mine? And when you look at that smile do I cross your mind?

 I dont want sound dramatic but i feel like something inside of me died that day

And i wont confess that i waited but i let the lamp burn as the men masqueraded i hoped you’d return with your feet on the ground and tell me all that you’ve learned cause love’s never lost when perspective is earned and you said you’d come and get me but you were 25 and the shelf life of those fantasies has expired lost to the lost boys chapter of your life forgive me Peter please know that i tried to hold onto the days when you were mine but the woman who sits by the window has turned out the light

They would be happy if i wouldnt exist,
           They’re always mad and upset because I’m alive

“Is it hard to love me? Why? I gave you everything you needed, I’ll give you my beating heart if you asked me to. Why cant you love me again? I made a mistake yes, but is it worth it? I love you so much! I love you so much and it’s destroying me it’s destroying my whole life its slowly killing my heart. I love you so much and I’m not even enough for you anymore. I am so sorry for the mistake I made but its not worth losing you. How brainless I was when I made that mistake? I am so sorry my love I promise to never do anything like that again but please love me again, I cant take losing you. I cant handle living without you. My life would be meaningless, worthless. I cant do this without you, remember? You promised to stay and I promised to never let you down but what i made is just a mistake and its not worth it!”

Two in the morning, down my cheeks, the bottom of my chin, down my neck, tears burning my skin. Running like a river, if i didn’t feel it as a tear i would’ve thought it was a shimmer. God rest my soul, I miss who i used to be.

I think I’m in love

Wish i could fly so i could fly to u and be with u forever

Take me back to the night we met, the night i first glanced into your eyes, the night i knew either you’re gonna fix me or shatter me. Take me back to the night i had this dream about you where we were holding hands while walking in a rosé field, you picked up a rose and got on one knee, “marry me Juliette, I love you and thats all i really know” you said. Take me back to the night I told you I’m in love with you. Take me back so i could stop myself from looking at your eyes at the very first night. Take me back so i could stop myself from falling for you. Take me back to the night we met so i could change paths and never ever fall in love. Take me back to the night we met..