feitted
what if we held hands..
freecluck
freecluck
❝ i'm sorry you expected me to cry. i'll never shed tears for any person on this earth, not after the people who were suppose to care about me abandoned us so carelessly. my brother would be the only one worthy of my tears. or anyone i call family i suppose, but theres not many to that word. ❞ this literally being about katsukichi having like emotional constipation because of ging abandoning both of them at such a young age. how that was the last time they let themselves cry, the embarrassment they most likely felt from the confusion on their younger brothers face. his questions constantly filling their mind but they had no answers for him, or themselves. only more questions. this could be directed at chrollo in the near future or anyone in general, maybe the troupe members ( feitan if he's threatening or harming them ), it's all situational. and this isn't pride, fear isn't a thing they allow themselves to have. it's practically impossible for them anyhow but it's more so about physically not being able to. not allowing yourself that heartbreak again. for someone to hurt you so deeply that you'd waste a breath spilling tears, when what you deserve is to hold your head high and smile if you're able to. ( could also be used towards giving estelle a pep talk about leaving and not feeling bad about looking out for herself. cause in the end, who looks out for you...more than you? )
freecluck
im probably gonna have a lot of these yap threads that start randomly as paragraphs and possibly either get left to sit and not add more or have plenty of other character stuff added under it. freecs kids, why must you bare such a terrible weight due to your fathers negligence and idiocy?
twinheald
i'm leaving them.. the spiders. ( ... ) i'm leaving him. i think i just need some time to focus on myself and my career. ( she pauses, eyes watering as she stares at the ground in front of her. for once, she is unable to make eye contact or even look at the other, as if she is unsure of her decision. ) i don't plan on telling anyone other than chrollo. the others will try to convince me to stay, i'm sure. i don't think.. i don't think / he / will care.
ⵢ sorry for yapping. i had an Idea. >:)
freecluck
maybe...it's a good thing.. ( they mutter, though unsure of themselves only due to the energy they felt as she seemed emotional about the situation. clearly she'd been with them for a long time, something kichi would never hope to understand. to be so close to a group and find yourself needing to abandon them for your betterment. perhaps that's why they chose not to open up to people. though somehow others force their way in, strange events they suppose. their brows furrowed in frustration at who she was referring towards, feitan portor. a person they couldn't help but despise for many reasons, though he didn't come at much surprise to them now did it. to finally get tired of the lack of affection or care, a practically empty husk of a partner. estelle truly deserved better but katsukichi would not pity her aloud or at all. she knew what she was getting into and she was not weak, this was all too clear. a spiders resolve could not be fully broken, ever. ) do what's best for you. if they do / really / care for you.. then they'll know its for the best. ( a slight bitterness laid in kichi's tone, not directed at anyone, mainly a thought being vocalized in the most emotionally expressive way possible. for their mind and towards another person, one who katsu had come to call a friend. but they couldn't help but feel that twinge of disappointment appearing, lingering beneath. though they said nothing of it. )
౨ৎ . @twinheald
paradoxes-
"is something the matter? you're giving me a bit of a funny look .. " he scrunched up his face , poorly imitating the expression , and then breaking out in a laugh at his own actions.
freecluck
౨ৎ . @paradoxes- not sure what expression you were expecting from a stranger. who you don't know. you came out of no where of course im confused and wary. ( they stated, their arms crossing, though their left brow raised slightly at his laughing. 'what a strange person', they couldn't help but think to themselves. though they didn't usually judge upon appearance, it was natural for them to have their guard up. it was just the sort of person they were, naturally. )
feitted
you are painfully unaware. sickening how idiotic you are.
feitted
ৎ౨ . in another life u would've been dating me...heh.
freecluck
౨ৎ . @spidrhead kattan!??!?! could be canon in another universe just sayin...!! hehehe BUT KATLLO >>
freecluck
౨ৎ . if u want me by adore & daiela somehow being the perfect song to match katllo (more so kats feelings) & estan (estelle!!) because they'd both have their own reason for being sick of feitan and chrollos games after a while.
freecluck
౨ৎ . you better believe im gonna yap your ear off about my thoughts n why i think the songs somewhat represent them. we can listen to them together!
freecluck
౨ৎ . "your eyes are lovely" just say you're in love with me??
spidrhead
your eyes are rather lovely.
freecluck
౨ৎ . @spidrhead no this would be the first. ( they stated with a slight shake of their head, he was getting somewhat ahead of himself with that assumption. this was supremely different from the other things he's done or said, so why wouldn't they be confused? that and they weren't exactly sure how to respond to such an intimate comment on apart of them. their brown hues trailed back onto him, noticing he had been watching them and they were slightly displeased by this as it only made them feel a little bit more.. shy? this was extremely new for them and not something they were enjoying. they then commented with their usual amount of sass, an attempt to block out whatever feeling that was arising. ) you're staring quite a lot.
spidrhead
you didn't? if that caught you off guard, i think i do and say a lot of things that would surprise you. ( his eyes stayed trained on their face, even after they looked away from him. chrollo wasn't the type to have trouble making eye contact. commenting on their reluctant smile could change the outcome of this conversation, and it was a risk he wasn't willing to take. so instead, he chose to admire it in silence. )
freecluck
౨ৎ . @spidrhead no, i can't stop you from speaking your mind. it's just... a lot different from what you normally say. i didn't expect that from you .. ( they're not looking at him and are attempting not to smile a little. they didn't let the comment go to their head, they refused to but it was seet...nice, and very different. )
feitted
ৎ౨ . praying on ur downfall ong.