Jasmine

Ahh, dear readers. It has been a while. Long time, no update. My bad.  I feel awful for abandoning you and my story. I think I may pick it back up and continue to write on it. Would you all be interested? 
          
          Much love, 
          Jasmine

I am sorry about an update not being done in a while. I just really want to make sure this chapter is what I know that it could be. I promise it will be up within the week. Thanks for your patience you guys!

Hey would you mind reading my prologue and telling me what you think? Thanks a lot! And I'll rad your stuff too.

Okay guys, I have updated the parts and now I am working on the new Chapter Three. Tell me what you guys think. Ch 3 should be uploaded by Friday, if not sooner. Happy reading, dear readers.

Hi

@JackSkellington1234  No problem. Thanks for following back.

Hey guys. I am currently revising Last of Malaera to make it better. I am sorry if it gets confusing for a bit. but I am hoping that this will make for an overall more captivating story. Thanks for understanding.

Hey Jasmine,
          
          I'm Alecia, host of CBY Book Club. I saw the comment you left in my thread Well-Written Books Wanted for Popular Blog and I'm here with my response. Check out the links below to get more insight into the opportunity I'm offering authors.
          
          In short, I have an activity called Book Of The Week (BOTW), which was created to discover good books on wattpad and showcase them to visitors of my blog.
          
          To find out how to nominate your book for BOTW, head to this link:
          http://www.wattpad.com/30121481-talisman-of-el-t-o-e-trilogy-book-1-cby-book-club
          
          Here's the link to the blog:
          http://cbybookclub.blogspot.co.uk/
          
          Do read the whole page to familiarise yourself with the function of BOTW. Thanks for stopping by the thread and commenting.
          
          Alecia :)

I hate Wattpad. For some reason, it won't let me post this onto your story, so I'm going to post it on here instead. :)
          
          Errors I found (nothing jarring): 
          "Quickly moving over to the vanity..." There should be a comma after vanity. 
          
          She grabs her coffee from the end table, but it wasn't told that she had left the bathroom, unless the table is in the bathroom, that is. 
          
          "Laughing she shakes her head and returns to the stove...." There should be a comma after laughing. 
          
          "I really did like for other things, like giving me birth." Maybe change that to "life"? 
          
          "Said it was how he was going to get........." I would change that- it's an incomplete sentence. 
          
          "She stares at me intently her cool blue eyes......" There should be a comma after "intently". 
          
          There were some other errors, but none of them were jarring. 
          
          I'm intrigued! I'm wondering if Jemma is compelling him, and I'm curious as to who was watching Mae as she was running. This chapter was a really good hook. 
          
          My only suggestions are to maybe slow the pace down a tad, especially on her walk, and to include more visuals of her surroundings and more expressions on the characters' faces to give a feel as to what they are feeling. More thoughts from Mae concerning her emotions would help with development. On her walk, expand, perhaps, a bit more on her feeling that someone was watching her to drive home the eeriness, maybe add an ominous atmosphere to drive it home as well- shadows, stormy sky, flicker of movement, etc. 
          
          It needs a bit more description, because I couldn't picture things that clearly. 
          
          And watch out for entrances and exits into places. Make sure to include those transitions. :)
          
          I'm nitpicking, though. In all honesty, this was a really really great chapter. I love Vampire stories, and this one is really interesting. I will definitely keep reading on.

Thanks for the follow! :) I'm going to start reading the story! :) :)