ghost and rose :]

hey i read one poem its so engaging and good

oh and also I'm putting up all of the poems ive made (and I'll be updating it frequently) so yayyy new "book" after ages of not doing anything on here lmao :D
          
          -ghost

hey y'all here's a mental health update from ghost :p
          (TW for SH, ED, and just all bad stuff in general)
          
          so I'm turning 17 in April, so that's crazy. uhhh I'm failing most of my classes, my mental health has been baller for the most part but sometimes it's fucking dogshit. I'm 8 months clean from SH so wooo anyways ive gotten slightly better on not starving myself except now I'm the heaviest I've been so that takes a toll on my body dysmorphia and my mental health... my parents are also fighting a lot so that's baller, it's mainly cause my mom drinks but she won't admit it even though both me and my dad know it (we literally found her alcohol) I've also had many panic attacks and mental breakdowns but that's basically normal at this point. and also for about 4 months I was in an online relationship with a wonderful girl named Beau and she ended her life and I found out on my dad's birthday (last year) so that fucked up my mental health when it happened. I hope this year goes better (it probably won't)
          
          bye until the next mental health check in
          
          -ghost

TRIGGER WARNING FOR THIS ENTIRE THING SO SORRY [SUICIDAL THOUGHTS, DEPRESSION, SH, ED and TRAUMA]
          
          
          here's a mental health update by the way for ghost:
          
          I'm pretty sure I'm bipolar due to having many of the symptoms so that's a start. I'm diagnosed with depression, anxiety and ADHD but I pretty sure I'm also autistic and bipolar (like i said before) I get really bad mood swings so often that I wonder why my boyfriend is still with me (he's been with me for 4 months) and my sh problems haven't gotten better I've relapsed so many times, I wanna die most of the time and I've actually thought through how I'd do it. for my eating problems which I don't know whether to call it an ED or not has gotten worse to where if I'm at an event where I have the choice to eat or not I just don't and most of the time I have one meal per day because I hate being fucking fat, I hate my stomach and I hate myself so fucking much. I'm a terrible person and an asshole. I don't know why the little amount of friends I have are still my friends. on the bright side though I'm hyperfixated on the outsiders again (way more extreme tho) so it's a nice escape from this shitty place called life. also my sh has gotten so bad that now I'm doing it on both arms and deeper with scissors which is so much worse than when I started. I don't know why I'm even talking about my "problems" mine aren't even that bad my friends have all the real important shit going on, I'm too fucking scared to sh with a razor cause it hurts too bad. maybe people are right and I just do all of this for attention. I wonder when I'm actually going to go through with killing myself. maybe tomorrow or maybe right after my 16th birthday on April 17th. who knows? maybe I'll just go to bed and not wake up the next day. maybe I'll die and go to hell like everyone tells me to then people will like me. people don't like me or notice me now, maybe they'd like me better when I'm fucking dead. 
          
          -ghost 

another update, still dating the same guy I said last time. I'm gender fluid and pan and still not mentally stable WOOHOO
          
          -ghost 

update on my life uhhhh I'm gonna turn 16 in April, I have a different bf than the guy I was talking about in the last update and I'm still a dude :]
          
          -ghost

so fun little story uhhh the guy I was with we ain't together anymore lmao and I have a crush on a different guy and he's cute and I'm in love tee hee
          
          -ghost

i hope this isnt a different account that took the name gh0stblossom after the other one but oh well..
          
          if you know me, it's soil. if you don't, its fine and dont mind thiss

I GOT A BITCH I HAVE A BOYFRIEND

Thanks so much for the follow!