📕🍵💬

Servant of Evil and Regret Message making me cry fr

I'M ALIVEEEEEE I NEVER DIED

There are so many things that describe me but four words literally describes me the most, and those four words are "idiotic piece of shit"

I look back at my past self and wonder "how the fuck am I like that back then? Did I not think through my decisions?? Have I always been this embarrassing and cringy???"

On my way to get sick for no fucking reason

I'M SO FUCKING TIRED OF PERFORMANCE TASKS, YES I KNOW THAT IT'S IMPORTANT BUT IT'S ALWAYS PERFORMANCE TASK AND I'M SICK OF IT. 
          
          CALLING OR TELLING SOMEONE ESPECIALLY MY PARENTS ISN'T GONNA IMPROVE, MY MENTAL HEALTH IS ALREADY SHIT AND I'VE BEEN CRYING FOR AN UNHEALTHY AMOUNT OF TIMES EVERY NIGHT BECAUSE OF SCHOOL AND PERFORMANCE TASKS ARE EVEN WORSE. 
          
          LET ME FUCKING REST, I'M SICK OF ALL THIS SHIT. I JUST WANT TO SPEND SOME QUALITY TIME WITH MYSELF TO IMPROVE MY MENTAL HEALTH EVEN JUST A BIT, I'M SICK OF CRYING AND HITTING MYSELF EVERY NIGHT. 

I fucking 'love' my WiFi, it won't fucking open the door in doors whenever Seek is chasing me, FUCK YOU WIFI. FUCK YOU

I had a dream where my cat bit my right hand and it had so many scars and my hand bleeding so much, although half of the scares and showing my bones, not bleeding and showing like a see through fabric that shows my bones. I bit on the fabric taking a piece and it tasted like cheese. 
          
          Disgusting. 
          
          Either way I was crying so much because of the pain, I went outside after washing my hands with soap and saw a figure in the corner and I asked for a hug as if they're my friends but they did so anyway, I thanked him for the hug before he disappeared out of thin air. 
          
          When I stretched my right hand, it felt so real, the pain is so real. 

Kind of a vent post. 
          
          I don't even get to relax anywhere anymore, even when I lay down it just hurts and I'm over thinking stuff, I have a math test tomorrow... As you all know I suck at math and this test is 50% of my grades and I'm stressed so bad because of it. I can't even try and do something without being stressed, get angry easily or cry. I'm currently crying right now because I'm so damn stressed that I only get 1 hour or 20-35 minutes of sleep. I wanna drop out... But I can't... 

Man, teachers already have high expectations for us all because we're in SSC(Special Science)?? Maybe I should just give up, my parents already have high expectations for me which is pressuring but teachers too? Give me a break...