𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚𝐡

hey hannah < 3 miss u. this app isn’t the same without you x

bae imy. hope ur doing good in life. ily. <3

just finished stranger things. i am. so. sad. but also yearning to rp it so hmu if you’d like to do that <3 

confession: I sobbed at the end of Free Guy

hii… if anyone wants to rp stranger things let me know <3

i want to write. i want to roleplay again, but the motivation to reach out is not there. i don’t know what is wrong with me. i think i’m just scared of starting up again after not having touched this app in ages. 

things have been rough recently. i’ve been going through a lot with my eating problems and posting here to people who probably won’t judge (or even see this) feels like a safe outlet for what i want to say about it. i developed an eating disorder this past year, particularly in january. in march i decided to reach out as my body was incredibly weak and i felt awful. unfortunately i was put on a long waiting list to receive treatment and it’s taken a toll on me recently. last week, especially, because i tested positive for covid on monday morning. the entire week i spent sulking in my bed, eating nothing, sleeping most of the day, and not even taking a look at my school work. when it was happening i felt like i was at the lowest point in my life, and i felt as though i had absolutely no purpose. i still feel that now. but this week i’ve been better, mainly because my mom has been helping me with my food intake. today after school i started cleaning my room, did dishes, did laundry, and deposited my check. getting back into a routine feels nice. but i also still have the lingering feeling of what am i doing this for? and where am i going to go in the future? i don’t have much time to decide. 

i find it so strange how i always seem to end up back on this app. i used to have such a deep connection to it and the community in it, but that happened years ago. now that i’ve matured i can see how valuable wattpad can be — because this community has gotten me through the most troubling of times. it’s made me miss how much comfort i felt here. but every time i return i don’t find that comfort again, and it irks me. i feel burdened by my past, burdened by my old works, my old pms, and every single waking thing in my digital footprint because it makes me embarrassed. i’m embarrassed to have lost some of the closest friends i have ever had because i neglected to stay. and that’s completely my own fault. i’ve now changed my username, unpublished my works, changed my profile picture in order to have a fresh start, somewhat… but i still wonder if someone will recognize me someday. and if there’s anyone here who does recognize me, hi. sorry it’s been so long. but i’ve missed you, and i think i’m back for good. 

i would literally do anything for benny from my babysitter’s a vampire 

heyyy lol going through another crisis <31