..close your eyes and pray. only to realize the footsteps you thought were God are actually yourself, circling back to round house punch you in the face for being so fickle.

"you're useless." you scream. vaguely, you wonder if you were praying to yourself this entire time. 

the loop continues in a horrifying way and you gulp down your blood eagerly, with the hope that you'll become something that's not yourself. 

but everything is you, you are everything. and you drink and drink until you've become pudgy and fat, sweaty and old, and you still sip from the cup because there is always something in there, and who are you not to take what is offered. 

and so with the dying out embers on the tips of your fingers you..