rain

I miss this app so much I kinda want to read fanfics again, plus bloodsport is getting released tomorrow so I think it may be a good reason to re enter my fanfic era, I miss reading all night but also I miss writing a lot, hope there are still people out there who read!
          love,
          Rain xx

I'm not back because I never really left but I miss wattpad aha I just want yall to know I'm doing better I guess? it has been so hard but I'm still alive (which is great lmao) it's almost 2am, wolves is playing, I'm watched old 1d interviews, somehow I always come back here, It's not a phase but a lifestyle, when I need someone i know this fandom is always here for me, the boys are here too in some way! it's like November 2020 all over again, every year at this period I feel weird and come back!(at least I come back) I have a bit more than a week left of school break let's hope I can take advantage of that to read lots of fanfics until I can't bc of school :( I hope you are all doing okay!!!

wow it's been a while... I miss wattpad so much, I haven't read a fanfic in months.. 

❤

PART TWO!!!
          
          ‼️‼️‼️ TW : mention of attempt of suicide, depression, anxiety, mental and eating disorders.
          
          In march I just needed something to keep me alive and reading wasn't enough anymore and with the little motivation I had it helped me, and in May I almost ended it, not to be tragic but it is the reality and no one knew what happened that night, I lost a lot of weight again I gained from February to May and am now fighting the urge to starve myself or binge eat. I hope no one is living this, realising what was happening to me was the hardest part.
          
          But before I knew people didn't care, now my family knows there's something wrong with me and they keep saying I'm dramatic and overreacting, if only they knew their daughter tried to end her life the day they said she just needed to be more positive, they also found my razor blade so I had to stop cutting, which is the best because it's summer now but it is not stopping me from hurting myself. Anyways life isn't always easy and as my father says "you're faking it, look at the smile on your face!" please check up on the friend who is always alone and is a bit distant, it's not because you see them force a smile that inside they don't wish they were gone.
          
          sending love to everyone who is getting through this hell,
          
          I pray no one will ever see this because I never said those words to anyone not even myself,
          
          again my apologies, 
          
          Lisa xxx
          

please read this it's very important I have some announcement to do! ‼️‼️‼️ TW : mention of attempt of suicide, depression, anxiety, mental and eating disorders. PART ONE
          
          I'm going to the beach for a week tomorrow, it's been 2 years I didn't leave my house, but I'm terrified, I know I haven't posted in — honestly I can't remember the last time I posted — a while.
          
          I wanted to apologise, I really want to finish the writing but I'm not doing well, my motivation is gone, I stopped reading too and I hate it, but I'm not even hurt I'm just moving on, but I know I will come back, I have so many books idea but, I don't want to lie to you my depression has gotten worse than I thought but reaching for help isn't something I can do.
          
          I won't say I will get better, being who am I is not something I can change, and I don't want to actually, if someone reads this and dare to care enough, please understand and don't try to text me it'll make me anxious.
          
          I'm not leaving, I won't, you might even find me in the comments soon again, and there's so many books I want to read here and on ao3 and I hate not being able to because those fanfics are more than that.
          
          It brings me the only comfort I can get, but now everything is so hard and I can't even read or barely answer.
          The only thing I still do is listen to music, and be on twitter and tik tok sometimes.
          
          Also, writing helped me so much when I was at my worst, I started writing because I needed an escape, back in September when my life fell apart a little more after an entire month of manic episode where I did things I am not proud of, I was depressed for several months until December where another manic episode happened and early January I was back in depression and lost a lot of weight. Some of you might know but without the boys I wouldn't be here, they were the only persons there for me when I was literally dying on my knees.
          
          part two after>>
          

https://www.wattpad.com/story/262047007
          Hi lad! hry? hope yu're staying good and fine, if you don't mind dear will you check out my new book which is a larry content for a better support? help me for giving votes and comments and if have tym can you pls advertise this story to your pals?  and one more thing don't forget to check my another book too! lysm! HAND TO YA! :)
          all the love poxiexx

heyyyy, currently writing chapter 10 ehe, it's gonna be a really special chapter :p so yeah kinda excited to post it! anyways I created an ao3 if anyone wants it, it's the same username as this account @/harrehtoplinson ;) love y'all <3

Just came her to say that I love your new pfp :))✨

also I changed my twitter username it's @/LiSa28clouds now;)