Hello Miss Lovegood and thank you for contacting me.
I am regretful to inform you that I do not possess the administrative power necessary to admit you into the Illuminati, however I am inclined to ask you about joining our local sewing club.
Note: you must provide your own transdimentional fish stick as they are extremely time consuming to catch and hand out to every one of our patrons.
Thank you for your consideration.
-American_Idiot7
(Dean of Admissions)