hinklepup

hey ;) thanks for being my fan. I'm glad you like "The Bro Code." 

Heya i still like your stuff and its much easier to read here than how you tried to show me before :P

Hey can you check my works. Any would do. Feedback please. Thanks for your time.

OK Noted! thanks so much for the feedback. I'll try to get more personal with Maggie character on the next chapter. I guess that's when I get more detail on the crash. As for the tenses... I will rework it... still confuse on which one to choose :p
          
          Again thanks so much, I hope you can read the other chapter and tell me your feedback
          
          Have a nice day :)
          

One other thing...when Maggie has flashbacks of the accident, maybe you could add in some details.

Hey! okay, so far what I've read (prologue through chapter two) is actually pretty good.  It's engaging and interesting, and catches your attention.  You don't really have a problem with grammar so much as tense...either keep it in the present tense or in the past tense. The prologue is a little confusing, mostly because you keep starting new paragraphs in the middle of what people are saying.  Also, Maggie's reaction to certain things seem to vary quite a bit.  Sometimes she seems like a person in shock (which is good- that's probably how someone who'd just gone through a traumatic experience such as a plane crash would act), but other times she acts like a bratty teenage girl...do you want her to be kind of in shock, or completely resilient to the effects being in a plane crash would have on most people?  One last thing: type out numbers less than ten.  Overall, it holds a lot of promise :)

Hi, This is my link, 
          http://www.wattpad.com/1248064-save-the-world-i-don%27t-even-have-clean-undies
          
          what do you think? I need to add something but I cant seems to find the missing piece..
          
          btw, thanks