hobizziee_

I don't know why I am posting it here but I seriously need to get this feelings off my chest to not give up I won't give up I will rise up better than ever 
          	let them say whatever they want I will prove them wrong they can't predict my future I can and I will don't give up you can do it 
          	Don't  be scared face your fears I can do it i can do it I  can do it no one can stop me unless and until I give up...I won't let your prediction of me failing stop me
          	Bring it on I will do it

hobizziee_

I don't know why I am posting it here but I seriously need to get this feelings off my chest to not give up I won't give up I will rise up better than ever 
          let them say whatever they want I will prove them wrong they can't predict my future I can and I will don't give up you can do it 
          Don't  be scared face your fears I can do it i can do it I  can do it no one can stop me unless and until I give up...I won't let your prediction of me failing stop me
          Bring it on I will do it

hobizziee_

Everyday it feels like a struggle...every damn day whenever I think like life's better it just keeps getting worse...I am trying my best why don't they understand...I try my best to make it seem like life is not hard I am doing better but it gets worse...I can't pretend anymore...They say you won't be able to do anything...They say "we aren't physically hurting you  we are just saying it's just words"...you don't know how hurt I feel everytime you say all those things to me maybe you are trying to help me be strong but your words are not helping it's making me feel so bad about myself my heart hurts so much it physically pains I feel suffocated...I wish you would understand I am not strong like you dad I am not tough like you mom I am not even quick witted and lucky like brother...I feel so miserable...I know you are worried about me but even existing seems like a task...They say "you are overreacting how can you make yourself so weak"...you wouldn't know unless and until you are in my shoes...I felt so hurt and miserable today I almost did something I didn't want to do...every f*cking day I try to act like I got my life together but it's shattered...everyday I am reminded that all of my friends went to college and I couldn't... do they think it doesn't affect me and that I don't feel anything any type of remorse I do feel remorse I do feel hurt I feel devastated but I keep it in because if I let it out you will make me feel like I am a very weak person who is a burden to my family...wouldn't it have been nice if it was just dad,mom and brother...such a nice family...they all look good together so much nicer without me such a perfect family I feel like a parasite who is just ruining my family I just wish to perish...I  can't do this anymore...

hobizziee_

I am balding :')

hobizziee_

@imurhoeurmyhoejhoe hahaha su
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imurhoeurmyhoejhoe

@_StarryGalaxxy_ holy shi-bgxhlrgkiewtkfkgjdtwoyeotlhdt5eo6kg bald peeps are totally my type plz keep Balding
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hobizziee_

Changed my username after a long time

Payelmegha

@_StarryGalaxxy_  O_o
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hobizziee_

@Payelmegha maybe...maybe not ○_○
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Payelmegha

I am dumb. So please don't mind me
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hobizziee_

Well...my tenth results are out and i got 82% and my friend got 92.2% and my parents are kinda scolding me for that...

Payelmegha

@KIM_JIWON_07 that doesn't make you any less intelligent...ik u r gonna do great on future
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lia_pabo

@KIM_JIWON_07 hehe ^_^
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hobizziee_

@liafics_ ooh thank you 
            You are the only one who appreciate me :')
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hobizziee_

Idk how and why i started being rebellious  I just don't know I didnot like it when they told me to study or when they tell me to do anything. I used to listen to my parents obey them idk why but after I was an 8 grader I was like i should do it how I want no one can tell me what to do and kinda ignored what my dad told me I scored low marks dad was disappointed but he said try again study like this you can achieve it but me being me didn't want to listen(I felt bad) and again as 9th graded I scored so low my marks never got this low dad scolded me but he still thought I could do it though this time as a 11th grader I am trying but I am getting distracted I knew very well what was going to be the consequences but still I was like a little more wouldn't hurt

hobizziee_

@KIM_JIWON_07 ngl I deserve it for not listening. I knew the consequences but I choose to not  care  but it  hurts I should have listened to him when he was here (he is here only physically not emotionally) I lost my of being his daughter I do deserve it to hurt my dad when he just wanted to give me a better life nothing else KARMA had to hit me 
            I feel like a stress giver(I am) the only thing I can do is give stress to everyone 
            My mom said Idk what I did in my past life to get a daughter like me the only thing you give is stress have you ever given us happiness. We'll I haven't for the past three years all they tried is to make me a better person  but I chose to ignore it 
            She said "do you know why they like your friends better she does what she is told perfectly even if.she studies for 1 hour she gives her all why do you think they wouldn't like her better. Knowing what I did I shouldn't complain how can they do that because I was the reason for it all 
            All I can do is regret and try to get past what is happening I just hurts I didn't shed a tear after so many things happened I feel numb my heart hurts I am shaking my hands are shaking I feel like I can't face the consequences but I have to from today I wouldn't have the same connection I had with my family i feel distant I feel lonely I shouldn't have ignored them all I can do now is try to be better idk for who dad?he won't care he isn't even talking to me for myself? I don't know if I am even worth fighting for anymore I feel like  of I die it will end my father's suffering
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hobizziee_

@KIM_JIWON_07 Father was utterly disappointed in me(i thought maybe because of my marks) I couldn't even  score decent marks he wasn't disappointed in me for my marks but for I was a no longer a girl who listened to her parents when they tried to help me I pushed them away what can I say I myself was disappointed that I stopped this low I wasn't like this i wish this was a bad dream I disappointed my dad so much he doesn't want to talk or have any interest in me as his daughter he said "I tried to show you a way out but you chose not to utilize me what happened to you?  You weren't like this ? Why aren't you listening or trying to be better. I am tired  I tried to change you but now I am tired I will give you financial support but don't expect me to be  with you when you fail or pass idc what you do I have no interest in you isn't that what you wanted to rule your own life do whatever you want idc about you or your life "
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hobizziee_

It's 12:30 AM and I have to complete my assignments  but I want to sleep

Payelmegha

@KIM_JIWON_07  it's ok...don't be sorry and yes stay safe and happy ♥️
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hobizziee_

@Payelmegha I'm sorry for late reply I am not getting notifications idk why 
            Life is good :')
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Payelmegha

@KIM_JIWON_07 ♥️♥️how is it all going?
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