i hope you will feel better about yourself soon hun :((( ♡
if you have body issues try working out and checking if some kind of food makes you fat easily, my sis was more than 120 kg and when she started gym and stopped drinking coffee (since she hardly can burn fat when there is caffeine in her blood) she reached 80 after 3 months and her body shape changed totally!
i hope everything will work out for you sweet choco :(((