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Ok so our next checkpoint for atyd is chapter 75 and im not gonna read much these next couple days cuz i have a LONG flight back from London and im gonna read it on the flight so that’ll go through lots of chapters quickly 

	wassap my dudes so two things, one I’m in Wales right now, two is that’s @yourlocal_idi0t isn’t reading fast enough and three (I said two Ik) my parents took my phone at night so I’m on my iPad currently cuz gotta keep the grind going anyways and finally I entered a writing contest and one of my followers is judging my entry and if you see this cuz ik ur done with judging, how was it or can you not say? Anyways I’m super nervous I’ve been waiting for the judging to start and I realized it was over for the category I’m in oh and another thing one of my fav drapery books was updated so I was really happy oh and another thing I can’t find anything to read on ao3 so Wattpad I’m back

Idk why but I feel like I’ve become distant with one of my friends cuz we don’t talk like we used to, they don’t answer my text with the same enthusiasm and when I was texting my other friend apparently they are still just as close and idk why that is since I introduced them. This always happens no matter what I do. The second I introduce that one friend to any of my friends it’s like boom I’m not their first choice it’s always that other friend. 

NO WAY WATTPAD HAS MERCH LIKE BRO NO IM NOT GONNA WEAR THAT IN PUBLIC

Y’all can just ignore this rant if you want. 
          
          So if you’ve seen my recent posts you know I’ve been having panic attacks and that I’ve been having more and I just want to say that I have no idea why they are happening or what is causing them. If you have any ideas please let me know. Also I would like to say that I appreciate your concern about me. I know I might just brush off these kinds of things but that’s because it’s how I cope. Anyways I’ll let you know if anything else in my life happens. 

So during lunch yesterday I had a random small panic attack @yourlocal_idi0t was a witness. I felt lightheaded and couldn’t breathe properly. Idk what thought on the panic attack but oh well

ITS SO FUNNY TO SEE YOU GUYS ADD THE MATTHEO RIDDLE AND REILLY SELWYN TO UR READING LISTS CUZ THAT WAS MADE JUST TO MESS WITH MY FRIEND

I fucked it all up. Remember how I said I might have ruin my friends relationship? Well the broke up today. Idk why they broke up but my friend said it was for good this time. I’m fucking scared because my other friend who is better at this kind of stuff isnt here so my friend can’t talk to my other friend so I have to try and talk to my friend about what happened because I’m scared my friend will k!ll themselves like they said they would if they broke up again. 

I need a new online best friend because as you know from my last post my last online friendship went to shit. So I have decided that tomorrow I will go back to Roblox mm2 and find a new online friend cuz I’m lonely as fuck. 

Honestly I’m really pissed off with my friends. So basically I met one of them on Roblox and we became good friends then I stupidly introduced him to my other friend who always gets along with people and I knew that she would inevitably “steal” my new friend but of course she didn’t really “steal” my friend she just got along with him but of course my stupid brain thinks of it as stealing. So now ever since I introduced them we don’t talk much anymore. I’m always the second option. I know this because I have to do my friends streaks and I logged into her account and what do I see? My new friend had texted her just minutes ago and I had been left on delivered for an hour. This happens constantly. Also my new friend ALWAYS goes to her for anything. I’m just there for when she’s not around or available. It fucking hurts.