Akaza’s plot armor

Nah I need seriously help, cuz like I read over 1000 fanfics… and I was like one whole year gone from this app… please someone tell me wtf I’m doing here? 
          

help my charger is broken 

HAHAHA WHY IS MY BOOK ON JOHNNIE GUILBERT PATOTIE

Why is my dad so fucking old 
          He was 55 when I was born 
          Btw this is not a joke I can actually show u guys a prove 

I just ate my dog , lol ☺️ 
          
          
          
          
          
          
          (⚠️ this is a joke , I love my old ass dog and I would never eat her ⚠️