마마..

Who the hell rosakkan watak Raudah ni-

I thought Laila was a chill character until I get deep in her emotions. 
          
          Damn she also suffered a lot. Syahir why you hurt her when you loved her a lot??

Still feel uneasy about my Korean OCs btw. I write her too ridiculously, too blindly in love but understandable. I wrote her using my experience watching my heartbroken friend who just broke her engagement with her fiancée because her fiancée dating her own friend. 
          
          But I think I wrote her too cruel. Too bad gurl... I can't save her even in her own story.

All my Japanese OC already got their ending. 
          
          Thanks to them I can experienced love heartbreak without coupling experiences.
          
          Special mentions to Sakura and Shino for bring me hard time with their complex way of emotions. How can I survived that?

Anugerah watak OC lelaki aku yang paling layak kena hukuman gantung sampai mati ialah... AYDEN RAYYAN.
          
          Tahniah kerana anda lebih binatang daripada seketul beruk bernama Maliki. Walaupun aku tak puas hati betul ngan watak ni tapi kalau aku diberi pistol yg ada satu peluru je aku tembak kau dulu. :)

My another OC : "Sampai hati Nayla dera kitorang kat plot"
          Aura Ameena : "You guys have plot?? She completely forgot my story plot"
          
          Is it good Aura Ameena? That's mean you might got better ending than the original plot lol

I want to write about Qaisra again and again but like always I feel disturbed so bad even it supposed to be hallucinations and daydreaming stuffs.
          
          Qaisra is literally me, but a little bit extreme. Atleast she got her mental health checked properly, mine not.

I want to write Aydeena's POV but I can't because I feel uncomfortable to be in deep of her character.
          
          I tried to understand her character for 2 days but I feel so disturbed that I get nauseous every time, especially the part she got violated by her own brother.
          
          Aydeena im so sorry to write you like that. It's so traumatized that me myself can't take it. I promise I'll give you a good ending.

Elyana's POV
          
          Dulu aku pernah sayang budak tu. Tapi sekarang budak tu antara manusia yang paling aku benci. Maafkan sebab dia budak? heol, hidup aku jadi lagi hancur sebab dia.
          
          Kalau bukan sebab dia, aku takkan dikahwinkan dengan ayah dia.
          Kalau bukan sebab dia, aku takkan jadi mangsa domestic abuse selama 2 tahun.
          Kalau bukan sebab dia, aku takkan rasa desperate nak anak lelaki sebab aku rindu dia panggil aku mama.
          
          Hanya sebab mama kandung dia kembali semula, dia dan ayah dia buang aku macam tu je. Kelakar betul. Macam aku ni sampah je dibuang merata.
          
          Dah hampir 5 tahun berlalu, tapi rasa sakit tu masih ada sampai sekarang. Sampai bila aku terjumpa mereka... aku rasa benci.
          
          Sekarang budak tu dah grown up, dah 10 tahun. Wajah dia makin berubah lebih matang tapi senyuman dia masih nampak sama.
          
          Dulu senyuman tu buat aku rasa disayangi, rasa dikhehendaki. Tapi sekarang senyuman tu bukan untuk aku. Tapi untuk mama kandung dia. Aku ni mama tipu2 yang dia kutip tepi jalan je haha.
          
          Aku benci budak tu. Aku benci dia.
          
          Aku menyesal sayang budak tu. Pergi mampus lah.

"kau tak rosak"
          
          So why badan aku malfunction?
          
          "it's a survival instinct"
          
          Jadi aku memang rosak la.. hmm