yowdream

I have a crush on him, I know to myself that I'm falling... But my heart still wanted the person who confessed his feelings for me to my bestfriend. I don't know if he's serious, but lemme say it to him "Please be serious, if you confess to me, my crush to --- will vanish and I will just lend my attention to you."

Someday...  byebye ehehe sorry to everthing... Please accept it po.  ,I'll leave very soon na naman. 

Dear self, 
          
          Sana di ka magive up. Alam kong konti nalang susuko ka na. Pero I love you self... Sometime I want to let you go para di ka na masaktan. Just tell me ha. 

Ganon na lang bako kasama para di ako patawarin? I feel so useless na nga e. Hehe. And dumb. Yung kesa mamotivate ka, mas pinagmumukha ka pang tanga ehehe. Sanay nanaman ako eh pero kasi masakit talaga. 

Bakit ganon. Yes may gf sya but my traitor feelings ughh. P.s this is not love.. Just paghanga but ya know.. It is still disgusting having a crush to other people with jowa arghh. Hahaha 

We went to Bahay ni Maria. I will not forget you nanay plantsa.
          
          With yan haze gons cj lab
          
          Sat. 03/30/19

JULY 2 2018
          Sa loob ng aming paaralan
          Sadyang wala pa akong nagugustuhan
          Ngunit unang araw pa lamang 
          Aking mga mata'y tumalandi ng tuluyan
          
          Sa iyong mga mukha'y
          Walang kagwapuhang makikita
          Mga salamin mong pangmatalino'y
          Sumakto sa aking nasaksihan
          
          Unang araw, unang kita
          Unang pakilala
          Unang paghanga
          Di pag-ibig sapagka't ako'y bubwit pa
          
          Nikwento kita sa kaibigan ko
          Sabi ko sa ikaapat na linya ka nakaupo
          Nadismaya sya sapagkat gwapo ang aking gusto
          Ang sabi ko naman "Matalino naman kahit di gwapo".
          
          Ngunit sa pagdaan ng araw ay unti unting nakalilimot
          Dahil may nagiisang binabalikbalikan
          Ang damdamin kong litong lito
          Unang paghanga noong nakaraang taon
          Sya parin sa paglipas ng panahon

Ya know... I always have that thinking that I should be better soon but ya know... I am lack of actions..why Razil? Why? This is finals! Wake up you bish! Maybe you are not that good today... But I assure you... If you leave your attitude of procrastinating... Everything will be okay....Everything will change. Always remember your experiences when you were in Grade 9. You did it! You got high grades and you were just you during those times. You were just focused and you just thought about what's happening to the present. Please Razil! Don't overthink! Think at the scenarios around you. Focus on what's happening in the present because you will not be able to unlock the future without facing the consequences in the current days. 

I got low grades this 1st quarter of 2nd sem. I feel a little bit of failure  but there's in me that I want to become better. I always think that I should become succesful someday and I want my family to be proud of me. Ya know.  Yes, Grades is just a number, It doesn't measure your greatness nor your hope for you to become properous because All you need is trust to yourself and to be prompt. 

Unang Paghanga.
          
          Note: Ang mga pangalang nabanggit ay di totoong pangalan nang kung sino mang binaggit.
          
          Aking sinta, oo, napanaginipan kita
          Kasama sina Birth, at Marybel sa eksena. 
          Isang disyerto, parang ganoon nga
          Sa likod ng tricycle doon ka bumaba
          
          Niyakap ko sila, at kasama ka na
          Ang higpit ng yakap ay tumagos sa kaluluwa
          Damit mong walang manggas, at itim na suot mo sa'king kaarawan
          Oo, tanda ko pa, mag-iisang taon na pala. 
          
          Sa aking pantasya, tayo'y iisa
          Naalala ko pa'y pinaghintay kita
          Ang sabi ko sayo ay saglit lamang
          At ikaw ay naghintay, maraming salamat sayo aking sinta.
          
          Ang yakap ko sayo sa panaginip
          Ay patuloy na nadarama ng aking dibdib.
          Ang aking utak ay nagisip.
          Ang reyalidad ay totoo, pantasiya ang panaginip.
          
          Isang taon na ngunit ikaw parin ang nasa isip.
          Ilang buwan narin nang ika'y huling nasilip.
          Aking bubot na damdamin ay patuloy na nagnanais.
          Makita kang muli, kahit na mali.
          
          Ang di pag amin sayo'y alam kung hindi tama.
          Paggamit sa kaibigan mo'y di katanggap-tanggap.
          Sabi nila'y matalino ako
          Ngunit syang tanga nang dahil sayo. 
          
          Maganda mong mukha'y nagpapatigil saakin.
          Mga humahanga sayo'y syang ang dami rin.
          Isa lamang akong 'ate' na walang pag-asa sayo
          At patuloy na naghahangad ng ikasasaya mo.
          
          *unang paghanga. I am 16 years old nang magkagusto ako sa isang tao.
          
          It's not yet love.. It's just an attraction.