ihateloliz

once upon a time, there was a frog named andy
          	andy lived at the patten park pond
          	and had never hopped anywhere else his entire frog life 
          	he had three best friends
          	millie- who never left her lily pad
          	billie- who was always hopping mad
          	and roger- who was arrested for possession of tadpole porn
          	so one day andy saw something hop across the grass on the other side of the pond!
          	"mille, billie, roger, look!"
          	across the pond stood the most beautiful frog that andy had ever seen
          	"she's gorgeous!" said millie
          	"she's beautiful!" said billie
          	"bit old for my taste, " said roger, classic roger
          	and then she was gone
          	"i need to go find her, " said andy, "i need to follow my little frog heart"
          	so andy followed the beautiful frogs footsteps into the forest
          	be then came across a turtle
          	"you can't pass!" said the turtle
          	"please?" said andy
          	"no" said the turtle
          	then, there was a rustling in the bushes
          	and like a man who had been shot in the chest with a rifle
          	the turtle was shot in the chest with a rifle
          	andy kept moving, but at this point
          	like the doctor of a kenyan track team, his patience ran thin
          	andy kept moving
          	he then came across a giant crocodile, and the crocodile began to chant
          	"i woke up this morning and i sat on a log
          	i opened up the menu and the menu said frog!"
          	andy said, "no no please let go of me
          	i can feel myself dying, you're ripping up my insides im never gonna find her am i, there's no god is there, fuck, fuck"
          	The end