aleng

maybe in another life, you aren't hurt so much. in another lifetime, you are driving around your porsche. maybe you even graduated princeton. maybe you are wearing your old money clothes and not the same blue dull one. it doesn't suit you. in another life, you wouldn't have listen to lionel richie when you're escaping your reality. you could have been that songwriter. 
          
          maybe in another lifetime, i was born a little earlier and i could make my way to you. to support you. i wish we were lovers. we could take care of your stuffed animals. you wouldn't have to be afraid. or live in fear. i'd give you the love you fucking deserve. 
          
          it must have been very hard for a little boy to think about his faults. you were forced to grow up. i am sorry for being late. i am here now but you are still there, stuck. i hope time won't steal your life. 

i hope someday, when i see you, you'd be on my favorite hairstyle of yours. because i like it when the strands of your hair cover your pretty sparkly eyes. 

tangina mo ka, sohee! nakakabaliw na!? magpatulog ka! kahit tulog ako ramdam kong love love kita! 

bakit ba palagi na lang ako nagmamahal pero hindi ko nararanasan mahalin pabalik. bukod sa imposible dahil idol yung crush ko... well, nevermind. pinanganak yata ako para magyearn habambuhay. anong gagawin ko rito sa feelings ko kay sohee? itatago? pag hindi ako nakikinig ng kanta nila, pakiramdam ko anlayo layo ko. 

nalulungkot ako kapag iniisip ko na maghihiwalay kami ng landas ni john louise. na pagkatapos nitong 3 semester... wala na. matatapos na rin kami. wala na akong hihintayin. wala na akong hahanapin. wala na akong rason. wala na akong bukambibig. wala na akong iisipin. wala na akong panghahawakan. alam ko naman na hindi seryoso tong nararamdaman ko eh. basta miss ko na siya agad. siguro kahit pagkagraduate ko ay hahanap-hanapin ko pa rin siya. o iisipin. pero hindi naman kasi ito totoo. diba? mali naman kasing hintayin siya. pero siya lang kasi ang gusto ko hintayin. 

if ever something bad happens, just remember  all the good things in your life. and you're stronger than that. 

maybe someday will come and it will be fine for me to realize that the love i'd find is not something like those in love songs or films... 

ano naman ang gagawin ko sa posibilidad na nakilala ko na ang taong gusto kong mahalin palagi pero mananatili lamang itong katotohanan. hindi ito magkakatotoo dahil ang katotohanang ito ay mahirap paniwalaan. 

people might think that no one could ever love me because of my attitude. they might think i'm incomplete because i don't experience normal, ordinary things. it's true, though. i want to have the care. 

sohee, i wanna see you on july 14, 2024. paano ko gagawin 'yon? but i know money isn't my problem. ang problema ko ay ang mga bagay na kaya at hindi ko kayang gawin kapag nakita na kita.