*  " I dance like a white dad at a barbecue party."

* "Of course life is a bitch. If it was a slut, it'd be easy."

* I'm as lost as Alice, and as mad as a hatter✌️

* sometimes I'm Mama June and sometimes I'm Kate Middleton. There's no in between.


Strange doesn't even begin to describe me.


Nikki: | sarcasm specialist | unicorn expert  | Charlie the Unicorn Impressions boss  | meme queen | professional procrastinator |


[My co-workers hate me.]
[Everyone loathes my positivity.]
[I get underpaid.]
[And the worst part is....

I live in a pineapple under the sea,]



{Request for Disney Land}

•Make a 101 Dalmatians attraction where you literally just sit in a room with 101 Dalmatian puppies.•






MORE COMING SOON-ISH

** I DO NOT TAKE READING REQUESTS **