insecretcode

How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? 
          	His lips are moving.

insecretcode

Santa Clause, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer, and an old drunk were walking down the street together when they simultaneously spotted a hundred dollar bill. Who was the one person who got to keep the hundred dollar bill?
          
          The old drunk, of course. The other three are mythical creatures.

insecretcode

Three lawyers and three MBAs were traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three lawyers each bought tickets and watched as the three MBAs bought only a single ticket.
          
          "How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asked a lawyer.
          
          "Watch and you'll see," answered an MBA.
          
          They all boarded the train. The lawyers took their respective seats but all three MBAs crammed into a rest room and closed the door behind them. Shortly after the train departed, the conductor came around collecting tickets. He knocked on the restore door and said, Ticket, please."
          
          The door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand. The conductor took it and moved on.
          
          The lawyers saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea. So after the conference, the lawyers decided to copy the MBAs on the return trip and save some money (recognizing the MBAs superior intellect and lower ethical standards). When they got to the station, the lawyers bought a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the MBAs didn't buy a ticket at all.
          
          "How are you going to travel without a ticket?" said one of the perplexed lawyers.
          
          "Watch and you'll see," answered the first MBA.
          
          When they boarded the train the three lawyers crammed into a restore and the three MBAs crammed into another one nearby. Shortly after the train departed, one of the MBAs left his restore and walked over to the restore where the lawyers were hiding. He knocked on the door and said: "Ticket, please."

insecretcode

The girl you just called fat...she's overdosing on diet pills. ==The girl you just called ugly...she spends hours putting on makeup, hoping people will like her. ==The boy you just tripped...he is abused enough at home. ==See that man with the ugly scars...he fought for his country. ==That guy you just made fun of for crying...his mother is dying. **Post this if you're against bullying. I bet 95% of you won't repost this, but I'm sure the people with a heart and a backbone will....