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and you hated that. you hated how i no longer let you bully me. so you began to distance yourself from me. you started to ignore me. so i did what i had to do for myself, i let you go. after months of pain, i let myself go. and still to this day, a month and half after i dropped you, i still continue to have nightmares and i feel horribly sick when i think of you. but i am healing and will continue to heal until you no longer affect me. and that day will come, even it'll more months or years. i wish you well. i hate you but i forgive you for everything what you did to me.

i was just your friend. i was there when you wanted me to be. when you were having a hard day. when you wanted to talk. you insulted my appearance and my intelligence. you blocked me when i said one small insult to you. after you had called me stupid, after you had insulted my appearance, after you had called me annoying. by this time i was getting sick of the treatment. i stopped sucking up to you. i stopped ruining my sleeping schedule. i stopped being kind to you. i was true with you. i no longer allowed you to push me around and treat me the way you did.

but a few months later, that love turned to fear. i feared you. i feared what you could do to me or what hurtful and nasty things you could say. nothing physical could've happened because you were half way across the world from me. i remember going to sleep at 4pm after school so i could stay up and talk to you to ensure you wouldn't find someone better than me. which sounds weird now that i've written it down but it was what i did. i was so scared that you would find someone better than me and you did. you did exactly that. and i was no longer your 'best friend' or 'ride or die' as you said.