YourLoooveMayi

Hi there!! Sorry for plugging! This is Mhaymyleneeeee . I just want to promote my on-going story, actually . This is my first time writing a story. Titled My Beautiful Struggle. This story is inspired by the story of person with disability. This is all about the life of a student with disability and a love story of two people in which a woman has a disability. If you're interested po just click the link below. Have a nice day. And keep safe everyone. Tenchuuuuu. ✨
          
          LINK:  https://www.wattpad.com/story/269712772?utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_uname=Mhaymyleneeeee&wp_originator=UKwFsi4N1%2FlElvRbvybb3xPtzCSvl3Vank0oHW19gdJ9ONmHngLctFY%2FXPOXECFmUk4dwoC8ByYrz7VOIA8CxiGPhiQvTacnrRWMIxKkYUbbngpCPtJxXb92wHZCVXAm   ( Vote, comments and share are highly Appreciated!!!)

Camiletots

Hi. I'm sorry for the shameless plugging. Kindly read and support my first and ongoing story "Chasing Dreams". 
          
          
          
          Hi author I'm an EXO fan toooo! But still a baby Eris. 
          
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/story/252998042?utm_source=ios&utm_medium=link&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details&wp_uname=Camiletots&wp_originator=zRtBYcYGaQdWvnSXMdRty8QX51CryNNK2YaSBOjTBDJAmnB1vvFw6CpoKJbSm3icZslgTncMIEOAkcIfFUO%2F%2BzX9Pd8S%2Fpwr3v%2F01p%2BYM8u7Dnz9ubho%2F9pbp4Y6IkTB

frailgf

`*:;,．★ᵗ⁻ᵗʰᵃⁿᵏ ᶜ⁻ᶜʰᵘ ᶠ⁻ᶠᵒʳ ᵗ⁻ᵗʰᵉ ᶠ⁻ᶠᵒˡˡᵒʷ ʰ⁻ʰᵃᵛᵉ ᵃ⁻ᵃ ⁿ⁻ⁿⁱᶜᵉ ᵈ⁻ᵈᵃʸ! ⁿ⁻ⁿᵒʷ ᶜ⁻ᶜʰᵘ ᵃ⁻ᵃʳᵉ ᵐ⁻ᵐʸ ᵏ⁻ᵏᵒᵒᵏⁱᵉˢ! ⁱ⁻ⁱᵗ ʷ⁻ʷᵃˢ ᵐ⁻ᵐʸ ᶠ⁻ᶠᵃⁿᵇᵃˢᵉ ⁿ⁻ⁿᵃᵐᵉ ʰ⁻ʰᵒᵖᵉᶠᵘˡˡʸ ⁱ⁻ⁱ ʰ⁻ʰᵒᵖᵉ ʷ⁻ʷᵉ ᶜ⁻ᶜᵃⁿ ᵇ⁻ᵇᵉ ᶠ⁻ᶠʷᵉⁿᵈˢ!
          ʰ⁻ʰᵒʷᵉᵛᵉʳ ᵇ⁻ᵇʸᵉ ᵇ⁻ᵇʸᵉ!♡ ☆・:.,;*

judykang0605

Hi! Welcome to my account!
• Reply

judykang0605

@HinaDae Hii! I just read your updated story. I am loving it so far!! 
            Just a few things
            
            1) There are a few spelling errors here and there but you can proofread and fix them quickly 
            
            2) i think you should leave a space in between the lines so that it's easier for the readers to read the story and what the characters are trying to say.
            
            3) I know you want to introduce all the characters but I think it was too sudden in the second chapter. Maybe you can explain how the character meets them in the classroom or during lunch time. Make it easier for the readers to remember all the characters. I know that most people who are reading this are EXO fans like meeeee but there are some new eris that might need some time getting used to them. 
            
            I think that's it :) Hope you continue writing your story. I'll be happy to continue giving you feedback.
• Reply

judykang0605

@HinaDae Hi! Thanks for reaching out to me about your story. Just a few constructive criticism!~~
          
          I believe the story does feel like it could go somewhere but it lacks character background in the beginning of the story. Maybe you can add a few details to explain the character's personality because for me it was a bit vague. 
          
          Also! Chen's introduction into the story was a bit sudden. I think u can keep the same concept but maybe you can add that the main character noticed that a new neighbor moved in and she was excited to know who it was. 
          
          I think that's it for all of my feedback. I hope you can also give my story a read, it is still in progress but I do want some honest feedback on it. Thank you!!