[2024012013]
It's 4:11 am and I'm in an existential crisis and I have no one to talk to so I'll write it here :/
I often think about the future, and I mean the distant future when I will be 35 or 36.
I don't really know? It's terrible for me and ........
I mean, there are still times in my life that I haven't gotten over - and it's not because I'm happy - but just because what I'm experiencing now is much worse
I moved to another city
I was harassed by street scum
I no longer live with my brothers
I am in my final year of high school and I am afraid of the college admission test
I What lies ahead will be uglier, longer, and more exhausting, I am sure. As they say, "Life is like a ladder. The further you go, the more difficult it becomes."
So here I am in my final years of my second decade of life. I never want to leave these days. They are difficult, but I am afraid of change. Man, I no longer want to lose another piece of me.
And lately, all I do is cry silently over my peaceful, beautiful days in which all this noise in my head was not present and preventing me from sleeping. Looking back makes you see how far I have come, and well, my road was really difficult to get here. I can only hope that things will go well. Okay, I'm not ready for another meltdown
Well, maybe I should appreciate these days, even if they are difficult, they will be a memory in the end.... and I will do my best to make them beautiful....
DONE ✔
