kashmirbaby

i retrieved the original copy of CoAL from ao3 and i forgot how much i loved it.

ahloes

I would like to say, I have thought about this story every day since I found it a couple years ago. As much as I hope you return from hiatus and post the story in revision or whichever version you deem appropriate, what I wish for most is your health and happiness. I hope you are in a place where you are safe and well. I look forward to hearing whatever updates you have for us! Take care of yourself and never forget that YOU matter BEFORE anything you create.
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kashmirbaby

i retrieved the original copy of CoAL from ao3 and i forgot how much i loved it.

ahloes

I would like to say, I have thought about this story every day since I found it a couple years ago. As much as I hope you return from hiatus and post the story in revision or whichever version you deem appropriate, what I wish for most is your health and happiness. I hope you are in a place where you are safe and well. I look forward to hearing whatever updates you have for us! Take care of yourself and never forget that YOU matter BEFORE anything you create.
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kashmirbaby

hehe i suppose i can make this an announcement for those who may not have seen my comment. i am reworking CoAL to be republished. that being said it will explore the aspects i wrote about before from a different perspective, i will also be putting warnings at the beginning of each chapter like i did before; however it will be a semi-dark/dark fic and if you choose to read it having read the warnings that is your decision. there is no set date on when it will be uploaded and i’m not too sure on an upload schedule yet as i have another fanfic from another fandom that i am working on. if you have any questions feel free to ask! 
          xo kashmirbaby

luurahmoore

I just would like to tell you that your writing style is immaculate. I’ve got a very distinguished palate when it comes to writing and I love when I can dive into a story and be completely immersed in it and you did that for me. I understand your writing came from a place that wasn’t healthy or happy, and I’m so sorry that you went through that, but I hope you continue to write even if it isn’t CoAL, you’re absolutely amazing and so many people deserve to see and appreciate your work like I do. I mean this all with good intention and the best of wishes for you.
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kashmirbaby

i deleted CoAL, i can no longer (in good conscience) keep that work up. it did no good for me as an author and it was only a way to relive my pain and the constant reminder of that pain will follow me around for my entire life, i do not need it glorified on the internet. this seems selfish of me but i’m hurt, i’ve been hurting and i can no longer apologize or make excuses for what happened to me and why i wrote that. i still love kylo ren and i am still planning other fanfics, i hope you can respect this decision. xo

kashmirbaby

@lilsharpie hi! if i were to republish it, it would be heavily reworked in terms of interactions of characters and the over all plot would shift. i wasn’t in the best of relationships when i wrote it and while i constantly warned readers to not seek the interactions i wrote about it felt extremely toxic for me to keep it up as was. i still revisit from time to time and write something that makes me more comfortable. slowly but surely it will come back.
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lilsharpie

i’m really sorry to hear i really loved the book but i completely understand ur decision. do u think in the future u would republish it or finish it?
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ren_scum

Hey, I completely understand and respect your decision. I look forward to seeing more work from you :)
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