you know, I actually like you that's why I create a huge gap between us. I just want to silent about this because I don't want anything people who fallen in love do. I just want to vanish this feeling quickly and act normal around you again. I hope you didn't surprised. since I used to call your name in every chance possible but then I suddenly shut my mouth and stop calling your name. And I actually realized that when we have chance to interact I always annoying, this could can change your point of view of me that I'm a bad person. Honestly, I couldn't handle that behavior, it's naturally come out to someone I interested to so they didn't discovered that I actually has a crush on them, I planned it to vanish those feelings anyway. but I know sometimes what I did what's wrong and might hurt your feeling. that day I was supposed to kidding with you but you didn't response, I think on my way back home, and suddenly I realized, my jokes was to harsh. I want to apologize but it's hard since it's mean I need to talk with you (I don't have the courage, bacause all those interaction between us after I realized I like you, almost you who start those conversations). even until today I still didn't apologize, I'm afraid that you already forget it so when I apologise makes you remind that moment again.