⠀ ⠀

SURE,   AS  IF  HE  WILL  BE  CALM.   death  would  be  welcome,   at  this  point.   if  i  die,   i’ll  be  happy  to  go.   i’ve  done  enough—    surely  you  feel  the  same?

ilya    to ── @LEADERBORN
            
                 I think he and I are both too old to be chased by ghost.  Especially if they are as spiteful as you are  ( … )  i’ll make sure the drama queen doesn’t make a scene at your funeral.

TELL  HIM  IT  IS  MY  DYING  WISH.   i’ll  haunt  that  old  man  if  he  does  not  follow  it.   no  one  needs  to  see  him  sobbing.

AGING  IS  AN  HONOUR  IN  URZIKSTAN .    There  are  worse  things  to  be  called  than  grandma ,   trust  me . .    I  am  caring  for  myself —    you  sound  like  Price .

Eh,  you’re starting to look like one,  an old lady that is.  Soon,  the kids will be calling you grandma when you come around—(…)—take care of yourself,  @LEADERBORN

YOUNG ,   HAH .    I  feel  like  an  elderly  woman .    I’ve  been  in  this  job  for  sixteen  years ,    so  what  if  I  sound  old ?

(…)
            
                         J:    〞I NEED YOU. . .  GOD KNOWS YOU’VE HAD SO MUCH PATIENCE WITH ME ILYA,  YOU SHOULD SLAP ME.  STRANGLE ME RIGHT HERE.  BUT YOU HAVEN’T.  AND YOU WON’T. I SHOULD BE THE ONE APOLOGIZING,  JUST LOOK AT YOU. 〞    A lovers coo,  certainly not fitting for a Captain such as Johnathan Price. A man on a mission. A man who’s just came back from death. And yet, in this small moment it seems awfully fitting for them. John’s fingers end up releasing Ilya’s, only to dig into the expanse of his back. Past the clothing, past the armor. Just skin to skin. John’s grip is nearly bruising, his fingernails leave crescent shaped indents on the raised scars of his skin. The moment is charged and John’s hands are steady against Ilya’s torso, everything about him is so sure   (yet—)  the kiss placed on Ilya’s cheek is tentative. Maybe, he’s waiting for Ilya to realize of his wrong doings and finally run away from him. 
            
            
            
                         J:    〞’M SORRY,  YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU.  I NEVER MEANT T’SCARE YA— ILYA, GODDAMN IT.  THIS IS THE LIFE WE SOLD OURSELVES TO,  YOU KNOW THAT.   I’LL LEAVE IT ALL BEHIND AFTER THIS MISSION. JUST ONE LAST MISSION. ONE LAST LOOSE END.  I’LL RETIRE,  I PROMISE—  JUST DON’T BE MAD AT ME.  I CAN HARDLY STAND IT, HON. 〞    His words hardly explain any of the emotions he feels. But John knows that the words feel like sandpaper against his tongue.  These words are final, they are absolute went this is a promise that could not be broken. The air carrier grants them no peace or privacy but this would have to be enough for now.  The hands holding onto Ilya’s torso eventually crawl up to his neck. John seals their conversation with a kiss, something slow and passionate. There is an underlying need that burns through out the kiss.  If he could not say the words he wants to say now, he’d say it through this. 

@kibravo     ⓘ.        There is this pained expression that passes across John’s face the moment Ilya  says     [“I’m sorry.”]    It’s such a simple thing for the Captain to forget the weight his very life and being holds to this team.    He is the glue,  he is the rock,   he is the oil that keeps the gears moving.   John’s fingers reach out to Ilya’s wrist before he could fully pull away from his proximity,  there’s a desperation in his gaze and a desperation in his words. This is John’s husband,  his solider,   his partner.       
            
            
                         J:    〞DO NOT LEAVE ME,  ILYA.   〞    And of course, he never would. They are bonded by  blood, spoken word, and a funny thing called fate.  But John’s words sound more like a plea,  he is begging for the love of his life to stay.  He certainly could not bear thought of losing (another) partner. Not Ilya, not him.  Logically,  John knows he has no right to ask Ilya to stay,  he knows that there’s an old anger that boils beneath Ilya’s skin. The inability of two old souls to walk away from this life that they’ve made for themselves. This world that groomed them to live, breathe, and sleep. War was their life blood. How could they ever expect any sort of peace? Any sort of happiness? There’s a bitter chuckle that follows afterwards, it’s such a morbid truth to be comfortable with. Why did he ever allow this?  (…)
            

ilya    to ── @bravo6d
            
                  An unreadable expression crosses his face at the onslaught of the rightful questions regarding Konni,  but [john] had barely come to and. his mind is everywhere but where it needs to be.   A few people try to approach,  wary,  unaware of the simmering rage that pricks at Ilya's skin like a bad sunburn.  "I'm sorry."  Is all he can grit out,  forcing himself to return to the stoic Lieutenant he usually was.  They were professionals in their craft,  molded through the years to return back to their formal appearance.  (Despite) it all,  a low,  growl warns their squad to approach with caution,  something taken to heart as they are once again left alone to their own conversation.  
            
            "You need to stay still,  and rest,  you old (bastard).  What were you thinking--"  Ilya hisses,  practically empty except for the fear that tangles into his words,  further complicating this conversation.   It feels too much,  a line being crossed;  turning into a quarrel between two lovers rather than a quarrel between a Lieutenant and his captain.  His hand slips away from John,  and he lets his head drift to his palms,  wishing that the world would swallow the two of them up.   Away from the pain,  the suffering,  all of it--so they could remain safe.  It's a selfish thought,  keeping a man like Price away from a world that needed him but (CHRIST) it is getting incredibly hard not to lock him away.

❪ID❫ ⸺  ILYA:      @7S2LIVE  ⌖      ⤷      j.p         ❛͟ ❛͟      THE LAST TIME I BOUGHT FLOWERS   […]    I THINK IT WAS FOR FARAH,   OTHER THAN THAT?    I ONLY GOT THEM WHEN SOMEONE PASSED.   MAYBE IT’S TIME TO CHANGE THAT TRADITION.          ❜͟ ❜͟         a snort escapes the captain,  it’s a somber joke made on ilya’s end.  he could already the sound of eloise’s laughter echoing out in the back of his mind.  something similar to a warm summer day.     john remains by ilya’s side,     his firm hand lingers on the small of ilya’s back.      there’s a massive display of flowers,   it’s hard to select the   “perfect”   bouquet for eloise.    something that reflected who she was a person    [   …   ]    the  color purple was standing out to john.   but the lieutenant would select the first round of flowers.

‘@specgru’
            ▇▇▇, ▇▇▇▇
            lt. ilya ‘kid’ svechnikov
            
                 The smell of the various potted flowers is overwhelming to his senses;  it’s different from the gunpowder,  burnt,  and metallic smell he was so used to.  It’s a welcome change,  an idea for what could be a better life if he tried.  Ilya’s eyes scan the rows of flowers,  looking for peonies.  “I haven’t bought flowers for anyone in so long.  [I feel as if she would be disappointed,  “not even for someone you love?  That isn’t me?]”.  It feels like a sin to make a joke about a deceased person,  and as on cue,  he makes the sign of a cross on his inner wrist.  Forgive him,  Lottie.  He could not resist.

She’d like the peonies,  I heard Macmillan talking about them one day.

(     @gravesco ;
            
            “I suppose all that matters is the greater good for others— right?”  A rhetorical question,  not really meant to invoke a conversation regarding it.  More so a jab at Graves,  and his unusual methods for protect and serve. (God he really did not like this guy). “Of course,  we all have a job to do, [some people just do it better than you].  Good to have you here.”

@7S2LIVE 
            
            graves only let out a small laugh , hardly scared what others thought of him .  especially after the whole.. las almas ‘accident’ which he’s put long behind him .  “ i wouldn’t buy into their bullshit .  didn’t come here to rub people the wrong way either  ,  just doing my job is all .  ”

(     @gravesco ;
            
            “[Can’t say I’m impressed or that I like you,  at all].”  As he talks in Russian,  he grins,  barely tolerating the other’s presence.  “I’ve heard things.  Both good,  and bad.  Like others.”

(     @BRAVO6D ; can u stop spreading lies abt me.

/  yes u do

@7S2LIVE 
            
            / that’s what they all say…

@7S2LIVE 
            
            unending , everlasting devotion was a blessing— heaven-sent  from a man like soap .  it wasn’t easily earned , nor was it too difficult to earn .  once had , there was nothing the scot wouldn’t do for his team— his fellow men and women..  his friends..  EVERYONE .  that very same loyalty also made things tricky for soap , so easily trusting which sometimes never ended well .  last mission clearly was no different , too close of a call for both himself and fellow soldier involved .  “ absolutely thrilled  ,  sir .  i wouldn’t even dare try tae pull it out from you .  ” his lips remained in a tight smile , almost like he’s been trying to keep the situation upbeat and lighthearted .  but in reality , he was trying not to be an ass— knew he could easily snap at his own superior(s) .  didn’t want to damn those consequences once again .  “ i suppose so .  still shouldn’t have been so reckless about it though .  i just..  i cannae stand leavin’ someone behind .  bastard’s probably got a loved one waitin’ at home  ,  it hurts tae imagine how they’d feel if somethin’ happened .  my maw included .  ”

(     @taskdemo ;
            
            Not only did he have to put up with others self righteous suicidal manic dreams of being a hero;  Soap,  also happened to be one.  The explanation and reasoning behind his actions was a strong one,  no man left behind,  but was it worth getting himself potentially killed as well.  With a tsk,  Ilya simply lets the issue go.  After all,  he did tell Soap that he wasn’t going to get on his ass about it today.  “I have been told I can get ugly when necessary.  Just be glad you haven’t seen it yet,  son.”  Simply put,  a hardened bastard can be a mean asshole,  when you have seen unimaginable horrors like he has,  you develop thick skin.  “I see.  [When will we start learning to stop putting ourselves in danger—].  It’s good to have another man’s back.  No man left behind,  or whatever they say.”

@7S2LIVE 
            
            the scot wasn’t a difficult person to read for the most part , often wore his emotions right on his sleeves unlike some fellow soldiers .  soap wasn’t afraid to say how he felt or show how unpleasant he’d been feeling since getting back either , there was no point in hiding it on his end .  he knew how sometimes reckless it let him be , allowing emotions to sometimes get in the way .  “ i wouldn’t doubt it .  let’s hope i’m not in the line of your wrath  ,  aye ?  somethin’ tells me it’s even worse than price .  ”  he finally lightened up a bit , letting out a huffed laugh .  absentmindedly he’d been chewing on his lower lip as to avoid bouncing his leg which he often did when annoyed or nervous .  “ it’s pretty stupid .  but—  i got into the line of fire tae save someone who came onto the mission with us .  kid was just a rookie i couldn’t just leave him there despite price’s orders .  so i was reckless and i saved him .  simple as that .  ”